Familiar faces
by xLoveMitchiex
Summary: Modern AU/Reincarnation Merlin, Arthur, Gwen and Morgana meet again in High School but none of them remembers their adverntures and life in Camelot.
1. Introduction

Sooooo this is my new story. I always wanted to do a reincarnation story and this idea came to me when I was talking about fanfiction and reincarnation with my lovely friend Cynthia.

That´s why I´m dedicating this story to her. She´s always nice, awesome and lovely. She keeps sharing her Merlin spoilers with me and without her I would be lost!

Hope this cheers you up hun! :D *hugs*

Merlin doesn´t belong to me, sadly.

Oh and don´t judge the story because of my gramma mistakes please, English is not my first language!

Enjoy reading! =)


	2. New school

„Uhm…good morning Madame." The secretary looked up, meeting the gaze of a young black haired boy standing in front of her desk.

"Good morning dear. How can I help you?" she gave the boy a warm smile.

"My name is Merlin Emrys, I´m new here. I just came to get my schedule with the classes…and stuff." He gave the secretary a shy smile.

"Oh right, let me just check…" she was searching through her papers, dragging out a single one. "Here you go, this is your schedule for this year's semester. You can get your books at the library which is open from 9 am until 4 pm Monday to Friday. Here´s also a map of the school telling you where…"

Right at this moment the door burst open and a young girl with brown, curled hair entered the office. "Mom!" she yelled. "You need to…oh, I´m sorry!" she stopped next to Merlin, gave him a smile and then turned her head back to the secretary. "I´m not interrupting anything am I?" but she didn´t really seem to wait for an answer.

"Mom you forgot to sign this paper this morning and if I don´t hand it back to Mr. Miller until 3rd period I won´t be able to go on the fieldtrip!" the girl handed a paper over to the secretary and looked at her expectantly.

"Good Morning my darling, lovely to see you too."

The young girl rolled her eyes. "Mom, really I need this paper!" she insisted but her Mom didn´t even seem to think of signing it.

"Dear, I will sign your paper after I told this young man where to head for his classes. Otherwise he will be late."

The young girl took a look at the schedule. "That´s fine Mom, he´s got chemistry with me now, I´ll take him there. Would you now please sign the paper?" her mother gave her a look and sighed but eventually signed the paper.

"Make sure he doesn´t get lost!" she yelled after her daughter who had already grabbed Merlin by the hand and was out of the office.

* * *

The girl had dragged him through the corridors and finally stopped in front of a class room.

"Good, we still have 5 minutes left." She gave him a big smile and Merlin tried to smile back. This was all a bit too much for him. His first day at the new school and he was dragged through corridors by a girl whose name he didn´t even know. In fact, he didn´t know anyone in this town, except for his uncle Gaius, but that didn´t count.

"Oh my god, I´m so sorry!" the girl suddenly said. "I never introduced myself! But it was all a bit hectic, I really needed this paper to be signed!"

Merlin tried a smile again. "No problem, I was just a bit…well surprised."

She smiled back. "My name is Gwen. Well actually it´s Guinevere but I don´t like to be called that way. It sounds so old fashioned! And who are you?"

"My name is Merlin, Merlin Emrys." Well, at least he knew the name of this girl. It sounded strangely familiar to him but he was pretty sure he never knew someone with the name Guinevere. Maybe it was just because their names both were old English names.

"Nice to meet you Merlin, but we´ll better get into class now. Mr. Wayne doesn´t like it at all when his students are late!" and with that she grabbed his hand again and dragged him into the class room.

* * *

The day went by very quick, Gwen showed him where his classes, the cafeteria and the gym were and while she then headed back to the parking lot after their last class, Merlin decided to get his books from the library. The earlier the better, he needed to study to catch up with the other students in his classes.

When he entered, he was impressed by the mass of shelves that got into his sight. The library at his old school had been a lot smaller, this one reminded him of the library in his uncle's house, which was quite big.

Merlin loved books. Just a week ago he had moved from the small village he had lived in with his mother to this big city. His mother had insisted he should go because living in a big city would give him better chances for his future. Thankfully, his uncle lived in Winchester and was happy to get to see his nephew more often. Otherwise Merlin probably would have ended up at a boarding-school.

"Hello. Can I help you?" the voice of a woman interrupted his thoughts, it was the librarian. "Oh, uhm…yeah. My name is Merlin Emrys, I came to get my books."

The older woman gave him a warm smile. "Of course." She said, got up from her chair and gathered some books which she handed over to Merlin. She then checked her computer again and turned back to the young boy. "There´s one book missing, it´s for your science class."

Merlin looked at her, almost in panic. "But we have a science test this Thursday, I need the book for studying!" Great, why did he always seem to attract the bad luck?

"Well, there´s one book left here which was reserved, but the boy never picked it up until now. I think I could give it to you!" and with another warm smile she grabbed a book that lay at the shelf behind her desk and handed it over to Merlin.

"Thank you so much!" now it was his turn to give her a big smile.

* * *

Merlin then put the books into his bag and decided to wander through the passage ways. Somehow he ended up standing in front of a shelf containing books about old English history.

_Strange._ Merlin thought. _I don´t even like history that much. _In fact, it was one of his least favorite subjects. It was boring most of the time and it seemed like everything repeated itself and there was nothing new. So why did he ended up here anyway?

"Right, I see your point there but I don´t have any time to discuss this. I reserved this book for me, which means you´re not allowed to give it away! Am I supposed to fail at my science test just because you´re such an incompetent person?"

A loud voice interrupted Merlin´s thoughts and he looked around the edge of the shelf just to see a blond boy standing in front of the librarian's desk. He was yelling at her and the woman, whose hair was already light gray, looked definitely desperate.

"I´m sorry, really but you were late. I didn´t think you would…"

"Would what? I reserved this book. You do know who I am right? I need this damn book and it´s really not my fault that a lady who´s probably way too old and…"

"**Stop insulting her!** Who do you think you are?" Merlin didn´t know how he got next to the desk and why he was saying this.

"Excuse me?" the blond haired boy turned around to look at the person who had just yelled at him.

Just for a second, Merlin felt something strange in his chest. A flash of an old, big castle appeared in front of his eyes. Then it was gone.

"Excuse me?" the other boy repeated, staring angrily at Merlin who snapped back into reality.

"I…I said stop insulting her, it is not her fault!" He still didn´t know what exactly just happened and what he was doing, usually he was not the heroic type of boy.

"Oh and who are you to tell me?" the blonde, who was taller than Merlin, didn´t seemed to be very happy.

"My…my name is Merlin. And it is really not her fault. You should have picked your book up earlier!" He had no idea where these words were coming from.

"I can pick up my RESERVED book whenever I want to! And you don´t have the right to talk to me like that! Do you even know who I am?"  
No, Merlin didn´t. and the blonde didn´t seemed to be amused about that. "I am Arthur Pendragon and this will have consequences!" with that he was gone and slammed the door behind him.

The librarian sighed and Merlin stared at the door. Why did this felt so…familiar?


	3. Familiar

_Here´s the new chapter, I´m trying to update and finish the story as fast as I can._

_Hope you enjoy this one! ;D

* * *

_

The next day, Merlin and Gwen met at the cafeteria during lunch time.

"Hey Merlin!" she gave him a smile as he sat down beside her. "How are you?"

He smiled back. "I´m fine thanks. How about you?"

"I´m fine as well, thanks!"

Today hadn´t been very special for Merlin, he only had English, Math and Chemistry class which went by very fast. During the breaks he had been on the watch for Arthur Pendragon. Not because he was thrilled to meet him again but because _This will have consequences! _was still echoing in his head.

He really had no idea who this guy was but he seemed to have a real big ego. Ok, he looked good with his well trained body, the intensive blue eyes and the strands of blond hair hanging into his forehead, but…

_God, why am I even thinking about this?_

"Merlin? Merlin?" Once again the young boy was thrown back into reality, this time by Gwen who waved one of her hands in front of his face. "Who are you dreaming of?" she asked with a grin on her face.

"No…no one!" he stuttered, trying to sound as unimportant as possible. Well, it wasn´t working.

Just as Gwen, curious as she was, wanted to ask further questions, the door of the cafeteria opened and a beautiful girl entered. She wore a tight, blue summer dress which went perfectly with her long, black hair. Everybody stopped talking and turned their heads into her direction. Merlin was fascinated by the girl as well, he couldn´t stop looking at her and was watching every single move she made.

The girl's eyes wandered around the room and she began to smile as she realized that everybody was looking at her. It seemed like she was used to this, but when her eyes met Merlin´s, the smile disappeared. The look on her face went from happy and content to surprised and shocked.

A flash of the girl in a long, old fashioned dress appeared in front of Merlin´s eyes, but as he blinked, it was gone. Just like the girl herself.

Did he just imagine that? Or did it really happen?

"Who…who was that?" he stuttered while unwrapping the sandwich he had been holding in his hands for a while now.

Gwen let out a little laugh. "That was Morgan LeFay, the head girl of our school and therefore probably the most popular girl on this school. And as if this wouldn´t be enough, she´s also Arthur Pendragon´s step sister."

Hearing this Merlin almost choked himself with his sandwich. "Arth…Arthur Pendragon?" he asked coughing.

"Yeah, Arthur Pendragon. Captain of the football team, most popular guy at this school and probably also the boy with the biggest ego all over Winchester. Are you ok Merlin?" she looked at him with a worried expression on her face.

"Yes…I´m…it´s fine." He was finally able to breathe again normally. "So you know this Arthur?"

Gwen rolled her eyes. "Yes I do. And thank god Morgana isn´t like him at all, she´s much lovelier, nicer and a lot more caring than him!"

Merlin looked at Gwen and furrowed his brows. "I doubt that it´s hard to be less caring, nice and lovely than him." Ok, he didn´t actually want to say that. He had only known Gwen for 2 days so far but he knew that she was curious and wouldn´t stop asking now.

"You´ve met him?" she asked surprised.

There was no going back now anyway. "Yeah, well the librarian gave me the last science book she had because I needed it for the test on Thursday. But the book was actually reserved for Arthur who then yelled at the librarian and I kind of got in the way telling him not to yell at her like that cause it wasn´t her fault and then he yelled at me."

Gwen squinched up her face. "Uh…that´s bad." She said and Merlin could only nod.

"Yeah, all I then heard was _This will have consequences!_" now he squinched up his face as well.

"Ok this is really bad. You know he doesn´t only have the biggest ego here, he also has a lot of money. You know, his father is Uther Pendragon. He´s Winchesters major."

Merlin´s mouth almost fell open hearing this. "What?"

"Yes. And that´s probably where he got his big ego from. His father is even worse than him. Especially since his 2nd wife, Morgana´s mother, died." Gwen sighed. "You know, I shouldn´t talk that bad about them. It must have been really hard for Uther. And I know that Arthur can be a really nice boy, if he just opens up to somebody." Her eyes wandered around to find the table where Morgana was sitting next to Arthur.

_What does she mean? And…why do I even care?_

"How come you know so much about them?" Merlin finally asked.

Gwen turned her head back. "Well, I´m Morgana´s best friend. And being friends with Morgana eventually leads you into a relationship with Arthur."

Merlin´s eyes widened. "You´re Arthurs girlfriend?" he asked shocked. This was the least he had expected, Gwen and Arthur? They didn´t seem to match at all!  
"Haha, for land´s sake, no! We´ve been together until last Christmas. It didn´t work out though. But that´s nothing new, Arthur can never stay with a girl longer than…well I´d say two months."

Why had Merlin expected exactly that? "I´m sorry." Was all he could say though.

"No don´t be, it´s fine!" Gwen smiled. "I´m happy with another one now. Actually, there he is!" she lifted her hand and waved into the direction of a young boy with black hair that had just entered the cafeteria. He smiled at Gwen and made his way over to their table.

"Hey love!" he sat down beside them and gave her a kiss.

"Hey!" she smiled. "Good you´re here. This is Merlin, he´s new at the school! Merlin, this is Lance, my boyfriend!"

Lance stretched out his hand and Merlin shook it firmly. And suddenly it was there again. A flash before his eyes.

Lance, with hair longer than it was now, wearing a shiny armor, standing in the middle of a throne room.

"Are you ok?" he suddenly heard a voice and was brought back to reality.

"Uhm…yeah, sure!" Merlin let go off Lance´s hand.

_Ok, what is it with all those pictures that keep flashing in front of my eyes?_

"He´s taking flight from Arthur. They already got into a fight." Merlin suddenly heard Gwen say and his face squinched up again.

"Wow, first day at school and you got into a fight with him? Good luck man!" Lance clapped him on the back, which wasn´t really helping.

"Lance!" Gwen gave him a nudge in the side but couldn´t keep herself from letting out a little laugh.

"No seriously man. He´s not as dangerous as he looks."

_Is that supposed to calm me down?_ Merlin thought. _It´s not really helpful!_

"Isn´t he captain of the football team?"

"Yeah he is." Lance nodded.

"How can he not be dangerous then?"

* * *

When Merlin entered the house, he was surprised to find his uncle home. Usually he was very busy with his job at the hospital. Gaius was 45 years old and a surgeon at Winchester General Hospital. Therefore he worked day and night.

"Oh Merlin, you´re home!" his uncle´s head appeared in the doorframe that belonged to the kitchen.

"Dinner is almost ready!"

Merlin let his bag slip from his shoulder to the ground.

"You´re already home? I thought you have to work until 10 pm at least?"

Gaius now fully appeared in the doorframe. "Normally yes, but I felt so sorry for not being there when you came back from your first day at the new school so I decided to cook you something tonight as an apology." He grabbed the plates with dinner and balanced them to the table in the living room.

"Gaius, this was not necessary, really!" Merlin smiled. He had known that Gaius was always busy and he never saw that as a problem. Everything was better than boarding-school.

"Come have a seat!" his uncle pointed at the chair. "Tell me about your new school!"

_Actually that´s the last thing I want to talk about._

He was still really confused about all the things going on lately. What where all this flashes about? And why did everybody he met lately seem so familiar?

"Merlin?" Once again he was brought back to reality. "Are you ok?" his uncle asked with an almost worried expression on his face.

"Yeah, I´m just tired." And that wasn´t even really a lie. "I met some really nice people."

Gaius raised an eyebrow. "Do I need to drag everything out of you?"

Merlin shook his head. "No, sorry. Her name is Gwen. Oh and her boyfriend Lance."

Just for a second Merlin thought he saw something in Gaius eyes. But before he could even take a closer look, it was gone.

_I probably only imagined that. _He thought to himself. _I´m way too tired!_

Merlin decided to leave out the whole Arthur story, he wasn´t really in the mood of explaining that now and he was thankful Gaius didn´t ask further questions.

* * *

When they had finished dinner Merlin gathered the plates and took them into the kitchen.

"I´ll be in my room. I still have to study for the science test!" Gaius nodded and sat down into his armchair but before Merlin was even on the top of the stairs, the door bell rang.

"Are you expecting someone?" his uncle yelled upstairs when Merlin stopped and turned around.

There was a strange feeling in his chest which had caused him to stop. I didn´t seem to go away.

"No, not that I know." But he still went back downstairs and opened the door.

* * *

"Arthur!" he was the least one Merlin had expected. And there it was again. The flash. He saw the Castle again, and Arthur Pendragon, standing at the window, just to turn around and look at him. This look on his face…

Merlins legs started to shake and he grabbed the doorframe not to fall. That´s what brought him back.

"Are you deaf?" he then heard a voice and looked up into Arthur Pendragons blue eyes.

"I…what…no!" Merlin was confused, more than ever.

"Look I don´t care about you, seriously. I have other things to do, things that are much more important than you. So would you please give me the science book that I RESERVED, thank you!" this wasn´t a question, it was an order.

"But…I…it´s…" it seemed like Merlin wasn´t even able to built one complete sentence.

"No _but_, you will give me this damn book or you´ll get much bigger problems than this science test!"

Merlin couldn´t do anything else than obey. He grabbed his back and searched for the book he had been given by the librarian just yesterday.

After a few seconds he fumbled it out and handed it over to Arthur who grabbed it with a harsh movement. He took a last contemptuous look at Merlin and then disappeared without saying another word.

Merlin closed the door and leaned against it. His heart was racing and he didn´t know why.

"Merlin? Are you ok? What was that about?" Gaius appeared in his sight and Merlin took a deep breath.

"It´s fine, I just don´t have a science book to study anymore."

His uncle raised an eyebrow. "Was that Arthur Pendragon?" he asked and Merlin nodded.

"Yes. Do you know him?" now Gaius nodded. "Everybody here knows the Pendragon family."

Merlin sighed and pushed away from the door. "Right."

"So what happened?"

The young boy shook his head. "He yelled at me and took my science book. That technically belonged to him, but only technically. And I couldn´t even defend me…I just…" he trailed off.

"That's so typical of both of you…" Gaius murmured.

"What?"

"Nothing. Let´s see if we can find a book in my library that can help you with you test!"


	4. There s something about you

_Wohoo, I´m pretty fast with updating! :P But this story really got me caught somehow and the inspiration keeps coming towards me very easily, so why not use that?_

_Hope you like the chapter, leave a review please!

* * *

_

„_What are you __doing__?"_

„_I´m coming with you!" _

"_Merlin, the chances are I´m going to die!"_

"_Yeah you probably would if I wasn´t there!"_

"_Right."_

Merlin awoke with a start, hitting his head on the desk lamp. "Ouch!"

He blinked and rubbed his palm at the aching spot. He had fallen asleep on his desk during studying. And the worst thing wasn´t that he hit his head but that he couldn´t remember a single thing he had studied.

Instead of knowing things about science, the strange dream he just had still lingered in the room and was all Merlin could think about.

It hung in the air heavily and as weird as it sounded, Merlin felt Arthur's presence.

_This is total rubbish! I´m probably half asleep!_ He thought while shaking his head, trying to get rid of the Arthur´s picture in front of his eyes.

_Or maybe I´m getting insane…I don´t even really know this boy!_

Merlin shook his head again and fleetingly glanced at the watch, only to realize that is was already 7.50am.

"Shit, I´m going to be late!" he leaped from the chair and while gathering his books from the desk, he pulled the desk lamp down with them. It got torn out of the electrical outlet and crushed on the floor. "Damn it!" Today was definitely not his day, not at all!

His uncle had already left the house, so there was nobody in sight when Merlin stumbled down the stairs and almost hit his head at the opposite wall.

"Great, really great!" he murmured sneeringly. _As if I wouldn´t have enough problems already!

* * *

_

Merlin was running through the corridors, having no idea where his class was.

Gwen had always shown him where to go but now everything seemed to look the same to him.

Just when he was debating whether to turn right at the next corner or just keep running straight ahead, there was a loud bang and Merlin was thrown back, ending up on the floor.

"What…?"

His eyes had automatically closed when he fell and now he felt a pain creeping up his back. "Ouch!"

Merlin tried to put himself upright again and opened his eyes, but what he saw made him want to close them again immediately.

"**You!**" he heard a, in the meantime almost familiar, voice. Of all the people on this damn school, he had to crash into Arthur Pendragon, awesome.

_Maybe it´s my destiny to argue with him._ The young boy sighed.

"**What on earth is your problem?**" the words penetrated into his ears and Arthur´s blue eyes pierced themselves into his own. Merlin was captured by those threatening, but at the same time so fascinating, deep eyes.

"**I asked what your damn problem is!**" Merlin heard again and was finally able to tear his eyes away from Arthurs.

"I…I´m really sorry! I didn´t intend to…" he began with a shaky voice, his eyes flickering around the corridor, trying to find a point to fix at.

"**You didn´t intend to knock me over and risk getting me hurt? What do you think would have happened if you caused the absence of the best football player at this school?**"

Suddenly, something inside Merlin´s chest was growing, he couldn´t define what it was but it was definitely making him stronger.

"Seems like you´re not only deaf but stupid as well." Arthur stated with a self-satisfied smile.

Merlin got up on his feet, clenching his fists. Now it was much clearer to him and he felt the anger rose in his chest more and more.

"You can´t talk to me like that."

"Excuse me?" Arthur raised an eyebrow.

"I said, you can´t talk to me like that." The young man repeated, staring up into Arthurs eyes, trying not to get caught up again.

"**You can´t talk to me like that I am…"** but Merlin didn´t let him finish this time.

"Arthur Pendragon. Captain of the football team, most popular guy at school, the son of Winchesters major but most of all a complete idiot." Merlin almost couldn´t believe that he just said that, but he couldn´t stop the words from coming out. "You should hear yourself talking! Ok, I got your reserved book, but you picked it up way too late and it wasn´t ok to scream at the librarian because it wasn´t her fault. She agreed to give me the book because I really needed it for studying ´cause in contrast to you I wasn´t present during the classes! And well yes I knocked you over, right. But I said that I´m sorry and all you can do is calling me stupid? Where´s the sense in that? I don´t even think you know how much of a prat you are, do you? You could for once try to behave like a human being!"

Arthur didn´t know what to say. And he was pretty sure that it was the first time this had ever happened to him.

He could only watch Merlin pick up his bag and march past him, without even looking up again.

* * *

When Merlin had disappeared around the next corner, he stopped and leaned against the next best locker. His heart was racing and the words he had just said were still echoing in his head.

How did that happen? Just yesterday he wasn´t even able to built one complete sentence in front of Arthur, and today?

_I´m really getting insane…_ he thought. Since he had moved to Winchester, things kept happening to him and he couldn´t put them into order.

"Merlin!" he suddenly heard his name and looked up. Gwen´s face appeared at the opposite classroom door. "I thought you got lost or something! Come in or you´ll be late!"

Merlin sighed and pushed himself away from the locker. It was chemistry class now, the day couldn´t get any worse, could it?

"Are you ok?" Gwen asked as he passed her to enter the classroom.

"I´m fine. I´ll probably be dead by tomorrow but I´m fine."

* * *

Merlin spent his free period at the library, trying to study for the science test tomorrow.

Unfortunately, Gaius books were a lot more complicated than he thought the school books must be, so he had no idea what exactly he should study because he didn´t even understood a single one of the texts.

"How the hell am I supposed to study all of this until tomorrow?" he murmured. "If I don´t even understand what exactly this book wants from me!"

After a few more minutes and numerous attempts to understand at least something, Merlin gave up and let his head drop down on the desk. He was never going to make it, never ever would he pass this damn test! Well, not that it would actually matter because he would have probably been killed by Arthur before even writing that stupid test.

_So why study in the first place?

* * *

_

After another few minutes with his head on the table, Merlin heard steps and felt the presence of someone close to him.

"Uhm…Merlin?" he heard a voice and he couldn´t believe that this voice had actually just called him by his name.

"Merlin?" the voice got more urgent and finally the black haired boy raised his head just to find Arthur Pendragon standing in front of him.

"Uhm…yes?" Merlin wasn´t able to get out more than that and it doesn´t seem like Arthur would either.

They stayed this way for quite a while, until Arthur finally broke the silence.

"You know, there´s something about you Merlin, I can´t quite put my finger on it."

Merlin´s eyes shot up to met Arthurs. Their deep, blue shimmer made him suck in his breath hard. His heart began racing and the flash of the castle appeared again in front of his eyes.

And then it was gone, just like Arthur. The only prove that this just had really happened was Merlins still racing heart.

And Arthur's science book on the table before him.

Despite how unbelievable this was, Merlin couldn´t help but smile.


	5. Crash

_Yay, next chapter! :D Thank you to everyone who´s reviewing this means a lot! This one´s for you guys!

* * *

_

Gaius was already home when Merlin entered the house. The boy hadn´t stopped smiling yet what caused his uncle to raise an eyebrow.

"What happened to you?" he asked, putting his newspaper down.

"Nothing." Merlin said, biting his lip to get rid of the smile. It was really nothing, right? Arthur was just probably finished with studying and had no use for the book anymore.

And still, why would he give it to a boy who knocked him over then?

Merlin didn´t want to admit how much this actually meant to him, especially not to himself.

Plus, he didn´t even know why this had made him so happy. "It´s just a freaking book, for god's sake." Merlin murmured and shook his head.

"Excuse me?" Gaius asked and Merlin realized that he had maybe said that out just a bit too loud.

"Uhm…nothing. I…I need to study!" he gave his uncle a grin and was already half way up the stairs, when Gaius stopped him.

"Is that the school science book in your hand?" he asked with a curious tone in his voice.

"Uhm…yes." Merlin answered truthfully and turned around to take the last few steps up to the first floor.

"And is it the book that belongs to Arthur Pendragon?"

Merlin only nodded. He was getting quite uncomfortable and the grin that spread out across Gaius face wasn´t really helping.

"And why do you have his book, if I may ask?"

Merlin shifted uneasily from one foot to another. "Well…we had a very nice encounter. Well actually the first one wasn´t so nice. But that wasn´t my fault, ok well, actually it was my fault. But the second one was better. Gaius look, I really need to study, the test is tomorrow and to be honest, your books were far too complicated!" and with that he disappeared upstairs.

Gaius shook his head. "You know, I´ve missed yours and Arthur´s little quarrels…" he said to himself, smiling.

* * *

Merlin studied all night, trying to get as much information into his head as possible.

Fortunately, the texts and information in the school book were a lot easier to understand than the ones of Gaius.

Merlin didn´t really want to admit it, but he would have been lost without Arthur. And that was something you really don´t want to admit.

* * *

After endless hours of studying and maybe 3 hours of sleep, Merlin grabbed his bag and left the house at 7.30 am, he didn´t want to risk being late, or worse, risking running into someone again.

_God, please just let me pass this test!_ He thought. _I can´t fail my first test at this school. And especially not after Arthur gave me his book to study…_

Merlin took a last deep breath and left the house.

* * *

The test went past faster than the young boy had expected and it had actually been really easy.

"Wow, you have no idea how glad I am that this is over!" Lance stated when he left the classroom and spotted Merlin, waiting at his locker.

"Ask me!" Gwen added as she joined them just a few seconds later. "Are you coming to the lake with us later?"

Merlin gave her a questioning look. "Lake?" he asked.

"Yeah, it´s at the side of the forest. Originally it was just a lake but then they made it an outdoor swimming pool. Except that they kept the lake for swimming instead of building a new pool with water that consists of nothing but chlorine." She smiled. "And actually, it belongs to Morgan's and Arthur's father."

Why didn´t that surprise Merlin at all? It seemed like this family was everywhere in this town.

"Uhm…yeah sure." He then finally said, causing Gwen to give him a huge smile.

"Great, that will be awesome! Lance, can we pick him up?" she asked her boyfriend who simply nodded.

"Sure, we´ll be there at around 4.30 pm. Can you tell me your address again?"

Now Merlin nodded. "Sure, it´s King Alfred Place No. 7." He said, pushing himself away from his locker because the next class was about to start.

Gwen´s eyes suddenly grew wide, which caused Merlin to stop, giving her a worried look.

"What?" _Did I say something wrong?_

"You do know," she began. "That you live right next to Arthur, don´t you?"

* * *

When Merlin drove home this day, he ltook a closer look at the big mansion next door for the first time since he had moved here. It was a really impressive, old building that looked perfectly intact. It was surrounded by a high wall and the automatic gate was decorated on an antique style. Actually, it was very pretty.

And there he was. Arthur. The gate opened and the blonde made his way onto the pavement. He looked up, meeting Merlin´s eyes, who were fascinated by his again. _How can this be so…_ he didn´t even have a word for it.

By staring out of the window for so long, Merlin almost missed the entrance to his own house and hit the dustbins instead.

There was a loud _Bang _and Merlin slammed on the breaks. The car stopped and therefore pressed him back into his seat.

_Wow. _He thought, taking a deep breath. _I have the feeling that I´m gonna be dead by accident soon, and I wouldn´t be surprised if it would actually be Arthur Pendragons fault._

"**Merlin!**" he suddenly heard someone calling his name, but it sounded as if it was far away.

"**Merlin!**" now there was a banging against his car window. _What…?_

When he turned his head, he saw Arthur standing there, banging at the window with his fists.

Arthur didn´t know where the fear that was twisting his stomach came from and why his heart was racing so fast. "**Merlin!**" he yelled, almost desperate. **"Open the fucking door!**"

The shock, it was probably the shock of seeing someone crash into something with their car.

Yeah, it was definitely the shock. "**Merlin!"**

Finally, the car door opened and the young, black haired boy got out. Arthur grabbed him by the shoulders, forcing him to face him.

"Ouch!"

"What? Are you hurt?" Arthur voice was trembling. Merlin looked up, meeting his eyes once again. This couldn´t possibly be a worried expression on his face, could it?

"N…no, I´m not." His voice was shaky. "Your…your grip is pretty tight!" Merlins eyes wandered to the place where Arthur's fingers almost sunk into the flesh of his arms.

"W…what?" it took the blonde a while to realize and then he let his arms fall down to his sides.

Merlin didn´t know what to say. He still wasn´t sure if Arthur had just been worried about him.

_This can´t possibly…I mean….no._

Not taking his eyes off of Arthur, mostly because he wasn´t able to, Merlin reached into his car, pulling his back out. His eyes were still on Arthur, the young man looked gorgeous.

_I can´t believe I just thought that._

Arthurs chest was rising and sinking fast, almost as if he had just run a 100 m race, strands of blond hair were hanging into his forehead, the shirt he was wearing defined his muscles perfectly and the mixture of worry, confusion, shock, and something he couldn´t define, in his deep blue eyes made Merlin want to…yeah. Want to _what_?

"Here." Arthur felt something pressed against his chest and looked down.

"I…thought you…you might want it back. And thank you."

It was the science book.

"God Merlin you…" the blonde was searching for words. "You´re killing me! Don´t you ever do that again!" and with that he turned around and disappeared.

* * *

When Lance and Gwen came to pick him up, Merlin decided not to mention the little incident with the car, and Arthur. He was confused enough and he didn´t need Gwen to ask him any more questions he couldn´t even answer himself. And most of all he didn´t want any of them to worry about him. He wasn´t even hurt and there weren´t many dents in the car either. The dustbins were pretty messed up though, but they weren´t that expensive anyway.

Merlin just needed to find a good excuse for Gaius later, but right now he just wanted to have a good time with his friends.

* * *

It was the perfect weather for being at the lake, the sun was shining and therefore it was pretty warm.

Everybody was having fun, they were swimming, splashing each other with water and just having the good time Merlin had hoped for.

Morgan was with them as well, of course, after all she was Gwen's best friend.

Though she hadn´t talked to Merlin at all. He was glancing over at her from time to time, remembering the shock and confusion in her eyes when she first saw him at the cafeteria. He still had no idea what that had been and he wasn´t sure if he would ever gonna find out.

Arthur was there as well, of course. There was this tiny little part of Merlin that actually wanted to see Arthur, wanted him to be around. And against what Merlin´s head was telling him, the part grew bigger and bigger.

_Rubbish! Seriously Merlin, this is probably really just the shock from the car accident! _That was what he kept telling himself at least.

* * *

Even though the pool closed at 7, Gwen, Lance, Morgan and Merlin were allowed to stay longer because the pool belonged to Morgan´s father. Of course Arthur and some of his male friends stayed as well. They were occupying the diving platform at the center of the lake, making all kind of somersaults and tricks. Obviously, they were bragging.

"I´m hungry!" Lance mentioned after they´ve sat down on their towels again.

"Yeah me too! Let´s go get something to eat! They sell it over there, where the dressing rooms are!" Gwen agreed, getting up.

"But the pool is officially closed, how can they still sell food there?" Merlin asked surprised.

"They always leave someone from the staff here when they know that we´re still here." Morgan explained and Merlin couldn´t believe that she had actually spoken to him.

"Oh, all right." Was all he could answer though.

"You guys want something too?" Gwen then asked and Morgana ordered french fries, Merlin did as well.

* * *

Now it was only Morgan and Merlin left. They sat there in silence, neither of them knowing what to say and both looking into different directions.

_Weird._ Merlin thought. _Just weird._

Suddenly, just in the blink of an eye, something happened. Merlin felt a tight grip on his wrist and he startled up. His head flew around just to find Morgan staring at him, eyes wide in shock.

"Arthur!" she gasped and tightened her grip.

"What?" Merlin asked his heart racing.

"Arthur, please!" Morgan's eyes started to feel with tears and her confused, begging look made something in Merlin´s stomach twist. He didn´t know why and what it was but he wasn´t able to move, not even a centimeter.

"Merlin please, Arthur!" Morgan repeated, breathing heavily. "He´s gonna die!"

This was enough for Merlin, he tore his hand free, leaped on his feet and ran.


	6. Close

_I´ll be going camping this weekend so there won´t be another chapter at least until Sunday. Enjoy this one! ;D Oh and leave a review please! *puppy eyes_

* * *

Merlin stopped at the edge of the lake, panting.

He didn´t know what exactly had made him run. The confusion and shock in Morgan's eyes, the fact that she had actually talked to him or the painfully, heavy feeling that was lying on his chest, making the breathing even harder.

His eyes were flickering around the lake, searching for Arthur.

_Why the hell am I so worried? Morgan didn´t even…_

And then Merlin´s eyes found Arthur who was standing on the diving platform. He seemed perfectly fine, not as if he was about to die.

Why had he listened to Morgan in the first place? Suddenly he felt stupid. Why did he care about this guy so much? Merlin shook his head and took a deep breath, trying to get rid of that heavy feeling that was still lying on his chest.

He saw Arthur taking a run-up, probably planning to do a somersault or something.

And suddenly it was there, but this time it wasn´t only a flash. Merlin saw himself running through a forest and from time to time flashes of Arthur appeared. He was underwater, unconscious, and not able to save himself from drowning. Arthur´s name echoed in his head all the time, driving him almost insane.

Even when the pictures where gone, the echo was still there.

_Arthur…I…

* * *

_

Meanwhile the blonde had jumped, doing, as Merlin had predicted, a somersault.

When Arthur jumped, he felt a sudden pain stinging up his left leg. It almost took his breath away and it didn´t seem like it would go away.

_A cramp! _He thought in shock. _Damn it!_

Distracted by the pain, Arthur hit the water in an inconvenient angle. The young blonde lost his bearings, there was water everywhere, forcing its way into his lungs.

Arthur wasn´t able to keep his head over the surface, the pain in his leg prevented him from thinking straight.

* * *

Merlin stared at Arthur in disbelief.

_This…this can´t be…_ he thought in shock. _What…?_

It was then he realized that none of Arthur´s friends on the diving platform were reacting in any way. Either they hadn´t realized what was happening or they were in a state of shock.

It took Merlin another few seconds to notice that he wasn´t moving either.

"Oh my god!" and with that he jumped.

* * *

Arthur was close to unconsciousness. The water kept forcing its way into his lungs and he had given up the attempts to get his head above the surface.

_I´m gonna die._ Was all he could think. Blurry images appeared in front of his eyes. Strange images of castles, crowded places and…

Suddenly he was grabbed by his arms and pulled upright.

The blurry images disappeared and he started coughing as his head broke through the surface of the water.

Arthur felt himself dragged into a direction he couldn´t define. He didn´t know what was happening until he felt that he was laid on solid ground.

His own name, called by someone, echoed in his ears, far away as if he was hearing it through a thick wall that surrounded him.

"Arthur, Arthur please! Please wake up!" this voice, begging for him to react, it sounded so strangely familiar.

"M…Merlin…" he murmured, eyes still closed.

* * *

"Arthur?" Merlin had grabbed the blondes shoulders and was about to shake him when he heard him murmur his name. And apparently, this meant more to him than everything else in this entire world. He was still breathing heavily but it felt as if the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders.

"Arthur?" Merlin now repeated, almost whispering.

The blonde opened his eyes, glaring at the boy who had just saved his life. His blue eyes were still a bit blurry but they could still capture Merlin whose own eyes filled with tears.

Despite how strange this must have looked, Merlin couldn´t prevent a smile of relief to spread out across his face.

Then everything happened at once. Morgan, Gwen and Lance came running towards them.

"**Arthur!**" Both girls screamed at the same time and kneeled beside him.

"I…I´m okay." He said with a shaky voice and tried to get himself upright. "It was just a cramp, really."

Morgan looked at him, pain and shock still visible on her usually perfect skin. "**Shut up you idiot! You just freaking almost drowned!**"

_Wow._ Merlin didn´t know that a petite woman like her could be this impulsive.

"We need to take him to the hospital!" Gwen said with a worried expression on her face.

"No really, I´m okay!" Arthur stated, this time a bit more urgent.

"Oh shut up!" Morgan repeated. "Lance, can we take your car?"

He just nodded, helping Arthur up.

Merlin on his side wasn´t even really realizing what was going on around him. All the voices talking suddenly seemed to float together in his ears, making it impossible for him to understand a thing. But he didn´t really care, all that mattered was, that Arthur was safe.

Suddenly he was grabbed by his shoulders and pulled up to his feet.

"Merlin! Merlin!" he heard his name and saw Gwen at his side, shaking him. "Are you all right?"

With that he snapped back into reality. "I´m fine."

_I´m fine as long as Arthur is fine._

When Merlin looked up, he saw Morgan smiling at him. Her eyes were still dark but there were relief and thankfulness reflecting in them.

"Thank you Merlin!" she said before she turned around to follow Lance and Arthur to the car.

* * *

In the end, Merlin didn´t remember how exactly he had gotten home. He only found himself standing in front of his door, fumbling the keys out.

When he entered, his uncle looked up from his newspaper. "Merlin, you look miserable."

The boy sighed. "Thank you Gaius, that´s not helping at all."

The newspaper was put aside and Gaius got up. "What happened?" he asked.

His nephew only shook his head. "Nothing, really." He was not in the mood of talking right now. Actually he was not in the mood for anything else than sleeping.

"Well, I suppose you have no idea what happened to the dust bins either?"

_Oh right…_ Merlin had almost forgotten about that.

"Yeah...Gaius, can we talk about that later? I really need some rest!" and with that he sunk down on the couch, eyes already half closed.

"All right my dear. I´ll be in my office if you need me."

* * *

He must have fallen asleep immediately and in a completely uncomfortable position, because when Merlin was woken up by the sound of the door bell, his entire body was aching.

"Ouch." He got up lazily and shuffled towards the door.

Merlin didn´t know the man standing in front of him but he was pretty sure that it was Uther Pendragon. The resemblance with Arthur was just too obvious.

His prediction was soon proved by his uncle, who appeared behind him. "Uther!" he let out in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

Gaius slipped past him to hug the other man. "I haven´t seen you in ages!"

Uther nodded. "Yeah, I intended to drop by more often but work is killing me, I´m barely even home! But anyway, it´s nice to see you again!" Arthur´s father smiled.

"Who are you telling this, old friend? I´m pretty busy as well! But don´t you want to come in?"

It was obvious that those two men had known each other for a long time, at least that was how it appeared to Merlin.

"Of course. But concerning the actual reason I came here I have to thank your nephew first."

It was then that Merlin noticed Arthur, standing a few steps behind his father in the dark.

"Thank him?" Gaius asked surprised.

"For sure old friend! He saved my son´s life at the Lake tonight!"

His uncle raised his eyebrows, looking at Merlin who tried to smile and shrugged his shoulders.

_Maybe I should have told him earlier…_ he thought.

"And Arthur is here to thank him as well!" he waved at his son, urging him to step forward.

Arthur didn´t look like the cool, conceited boy anymore. He just looked like a normal guy and Merlin loved this look on him.

_I can´t believe I just thought that! I´m not…_

"So, would you like a tea, Uther?" Gaius interrupted Merlin´s thoughts for which he was actually pretty glad.

"I´d prefer a scotch." Uther grinned and so did Gaius.

"Arthur, maybe you wanna go with Merlin to his room or something to say thank you while my old friend here and me have a nice little chat?" It was more of an order than a proposition but Arthur didn´t seem to resist.

Merlin turned around and pointed upstairs. He didn´t want to look at Arthur because he already felt his heart accelerating and he couldn´t risk getting caught up in those beautiful eyes again.

_Hell I need to stop thinking about such things!

* * *

_

The boys had been sitting on Merlin´s bed in silence for quite a while now. The black haired boy had his hands intertwined, lying in his lap, almost as if he was praying. He was biting his lip as well and his heart was still racing. All those things were just underlining the tension that was hanging in the air.

"So…" Arthur didn´t make it much further.

"Yeah?"

"I…I wanted to…you know…god would you just look at me please?" Arthur said nervously.

Merlin forced himself to turn his head into the blonde´s direction.

And there they were again, these deep, blue eyes and yes, they were damn beautiful.

"I…I just wanted to say…" Arthur paused, getting distracted by Merlin´s eyes himself. They seemed to have some kind of a golden shimmer, he never noticed that before.

"I…I…you…" it seemed like he wasn´t able to complete just one of his sentences.

And just for a short moment, Merlin saw something in Arthur´s eyes. It was like a glimpse into his soul. There was fear, confusion, passion, strength and…longing?

Merlin hadn´t noticed that he has leaned closer to the blonde while looking into his eyes.

"What are you…" Arthur trailed off again, feeling Merlin´s breath against his lips.

"I don´t know…" this was barely a whisper, escaping Merlin´s mouth and lingering in the air.

He really didn´t know, right now Merlin couldn´t even think clearly. Thoughts were chasing themselves in his head, his heartbeat was a lot faster than it was supposed to be and inhaling Arthur´s somehow unmistakable smell, which seemed so familiar, made him dizzy.

This whole situation was really absurd, they shouldn´t be this close! But there was something inside Merlin, and Arthur as well, that made it feel right. Made it feel like they belonged just there.

Their lips were almost touching now and Merlin knew that he should close his eyes but he couldn´t. He was lost in Arthur´s, piercing themselves into his own, as if they would never want to look away.

"Merlin…"Arthur breathed and the black haired boy shivered.

Just a few more inches and they would…

"Arthur!" the door flew open and both boys jerked back, causing Merlin to almost fall off the bed.

"F…father!" the blonde stuttered, his heart racing.

"Yes indeed. I am leaving now, do you want to join me or are you planning to stay longer?"

Arthur shot a glance at Merlin and then looked back to his father.

"N…no. I´m coming." He got up from the bed and joined his father at the door.

"Bye Merlin. Oh and…thank you!" he said with a formal tone in his voice.

"You´re thanking him now? What did you guys do in here all the time?" Uther gave his son a questioning look but Arthur only shrugged his shoulders.

"I´m tired father!" and with that he disappeared.

"That´s so typical of my son." Uther sighed. "He never really talks to me."

Merlin was still in shock, sitting on the bed, his hands clenching to the sheets.

"Well anyway. Thanks again Merlin. You might want to come over some time and join us for dinner!"

The young boy nodded. "It would be a pleasure." He answered, absent-minded.

"Great!" with that Uther Pendragon was gone and Merlin was left alone.

_Did all of this just really happen?_


	7. Morgana

_Sooooo camping was great and now I´m back with a new chapter! =)_

_I have no idea where Camelot was and I don´t think anyone really does but Winchester is linked to the Arthurian Legend so let´s just pretend it was there for this story, ok? ;D  
Enjoy!_

_Oh and why are Gwen and Lance the only ones being excited about this trip? Well probably because they were the only ones who were really happy with each other having this affair. XD

* * *

_

When Merlin opened his eyes, he blinked a few times, trying to avoid the sunlight that was finding its way into his room.

When he was trying to get up, he realized that he had slept in his daily clothes.

Did this all really happen yesterday?

His head was aching from the dreams that had haunted him last night. Quick changing, blurry pictures of Arthur, this castle he kept seeing, him and other people he didn´t know. Or at least Merlin thought he didn´t, and still they seemed familiar in a strange way.

_I can´t believe I almost…_ He shook his head. _Either I´m really getting insane or it was the shock…or I am…_

After a few minutes of not moving and listening to his own breath, Merlin decided that it was the shock. It couldn´t be anything else than the shock.

Could it?

* * *

Arthur hadn´t slept for longer than 3 hours.

He had tossed and turned himself from one side to another the entire night.

After he had admitted to himself that it hadn´t been a dream, his head had been full of questions.

Why did that _almost _happen? Who was this Merlin boy? Why did he care so much? And why the hell couldn´t he stop thinking about this…

"God Arthur, STOP that!" he rebuked himself not wanting to think about anything that concerned last night anymore. This was stupid, stupid and insane.

"It was the shock." He decided after a while. "Right, it was the shock."

And with that the young blond got up to get dressed for school.

* * *

When Merlin arrived at school as usual, Gwen was already there. She was standing in front of the blue bus that would take them on their fieldtrip today.

Gwen was waving her hand high up in the air and Merlin smiled at her, making his way through the crowd to get to his friend.

"Hey Merlin! How are you?" she asked and gave him a big smile.

_Confused._ He wanted to say but decided not to, because he couldn´t possibly tell her that he almost…_kissed Arthur._

Only the thought of that made his heart beat a lot faster and shook his head, trying to get rid of the intense blue eyes that were appearing in front of his eyes.

"Merlin?" he heard his name and the blue eyes were replaced by dark ones, staring up at him with a troubled expression.

"I´m fine thanks, Gwen." he didn´t want to talk about this now. In fact he wasn´t sure if he would ever want to talk about this.

"Where´s is Lance anyway?" Merlin tried to switch subjects, which apparently seemed to work.

"He just sent me a text message. His Dad took his car and now he need to take the bus so he´ll be a bit late!"

Mentioning the car, Merlin thought about Gaius and that he still hadn´t explained what had happened to the dustbins and he wasn´t sure if his uncle had already discovered the dents. Although this was the last thing he was worried about now.

Merlin´s eyes were wandering around his classmates, who were waiting for the fieldtrip to begin.

They would visit the old Great Hall with their history class, because they were about to start a new topic concerning the Arthurian Legend.

Merlin had heard of it but never really read anything about King Arthur, he hadn´t even seen the movie even though Keira Knightley had looked fantastic on the preview poster.

_Why does this guy have to be called Arthur?_ The young boy thought.

Every other name would have been fine, but no he needed to be called Arthur.

"Great…now I´m blaming history…" Merlin murmured to himself, his eyes still wandering around.

And then he met Arthur´s, the blue eyes that caught his glance and looked back shyly for just the blink of an eye. Merlin could only gasp once before the blonde turned away.

* * *

_God._

Arthur´s stomach made a flip and his heart was beating faster, even after he had looked away.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_ He thought, shaking his head. "He is just a guy, Arthur. Just a normal guy!" he murmured.

_A guy that saved your life and the guy you almost kissed. _The voice was in his head and no matter how hard Arthur tried, he couldn´t get rid of it.

_The guy you almost kissed! _It kept echoing in his head.

"Oh just shut it!"

* * *

Lance just arrived in time and sat down beside his girlfriend.

"Aren´t you excited about this trip?" she asked and looked over her seat to Merlin, who was sitting in a row behind them.

"Yeah, kind of." He wasn´t, really. And it wasn´t only Arthur, there was also a strange feeling inside his stomach, making him feel worried.

Gwen and Lance on their side were pretty excited.

"I already have some brochures if you wanna read one!" she held them over to Merlin who shook his head.

"No thanks. I´ll let them surprise me."

Instead of taking the brochure, he glanced over to Morgan, who was sitting on the other side of the aisle. She was staring out of the window, watching the houses and trees passing by.

_She seems so lost…_

And Merlin couldn´t help but to think that she was feeling the same way he did about this trip.

* * *

"Situated at the top of the High Street just to the left of The Westgate, The Great Hall and Sally Port are the only surviving parts of Winchester Castle and are owned and maintained by Hampshire County Council."

Merlin wasn´t really listening to the tour guide, his eyes were glued to the walls of the Great Hall instead. Its force of gravitation was so strong and that was confusing the young boy.

_It´s just an old ruin! _He told himself. _Nothing special!_

He wasn´t even interested in history, but why did this seem so important to him then?

The worried feeling in Merlin´s stomach was still there but it was mixing up with something else. Something he couldn´t quite define.

"We´ll be taking a walk around the Great Hall now and after that I´ll be showing you guys the inside which is famous mostly for King Arthur´s round table!"

Merlin´s stomach did a flip on that.

_King Arthur´s round table?_

"People even assume that the Great Hall was built exactly where once Camelot, King Arthur´s famous castle, stood."

The flash of the castle appeared in front of Merlin´s eyes again.

_Camelot._ It echoed in his head. _Home of the famous King Arthur._

His head was spinning from all the images and echoes, which were confusing him even more.

Something was drawing him inside this building, a strong force which he couldn´t resist.

Merlin didn´t know what it was, but he needed to follow. His feet were moving by themselves and even if he would have wanted, Merlin couldn´t stop.

While his group continued their way around the Great Hall then, Merlin entered the building.

* * *

There was a small corridor who was supposed to lead to the biggest room, the Great Hall itself.

Merlin´s feet were getting faster and faster, carrying him through the twisted corridor.

It seemed like something inside him knew exactly where to go.

_What´s wrong with me?_ He thought, now a lot more worried than before. The twisted feeling in his stomach was getting stronger and stronger, stretching out into his whole body.

_Why am I so fascinated by this ruin? It´s only a…_

Just when he was about to walk around the next Corner, Merlin bumped into someone.

"Morgana!" he exclaimed, without even thinking about what he was saying.

She stared at him in shock.

"Why did you call me like that?" she asked but Merlin had no answer.

"I don´t know!" he answered truthfully. He really didn´t, it just happened.

Merlin was getting uncomfortable. He didn´t know what was going on with him lately, he and Morgana…Morgan, seemed to have some kind of bond, but he couldn´t define it yet.

_I can´t define anything!_ Merlin thought almost angry. He had never felt so lost in his entire life.

"Look, I know your name is Morgan and not Morgana! I don´t know why I called you this way, really!"

Merlin tried to get sense into his thoughts but they were still blurred and nothing seemed to work right in his mind.

"Stop apologizing and tell me where you got that name from!" he heard Morgan´s voice and looked at her helplessly.

"Who are you Merlin Emrys?" she glanced at him with a worried expression on her face.

"Morgana, that´s how you call me in my dreams."


	8. About time

_Soooo here I´m back with a new chapter! Sorry that it took so long but my past week has been very hard not and not very good for me but things are getting better plus I´ll be in Denmark for the next week, on vacation! =)_

_So hope you enjoy this chapter!

* * *

_

Merlin stared at her, his brows furrowed and confusion all over his face.

"What?"

_What does she mean with "that´s how you call me in my dreams?"_

Morgana seemed just as confused as he was, her eyes wandered around the corridor, finally resting on him.

"I´m only telling you this, Merlin, because I trust you, in a strange way." She paused for a second and he knew exactly how she felt and what she meant, but that scared him a little.

"I keep having these dreams, you know. I see things before they really happen."

Merlin kept quiet and listened to Morgan. It sounded unreal to him, but still it felt kind of familiar. As if he had already known for a long time.

"First, it started with knowing that we would write a surprise test on a certain day. I knew that we would lose our homecoming game and I knew the exact score." She paused again, curling one of the long strands of her hair around her finger.

"I knew that Arthur and Gwen would break up on Christmas even before they did."

Merlin still stared at her. A part of him couldn´t believe what he was hearing, but this strange feeling, still twisting his stomach, seemed to go straight to his head, telling him to believe her.

_But…how can that be?_

"And then I kept dreaming about other things." Another break, her eyes were fixing his now.

"I see myself in this big castle, sitting on a throne next to my stepfather. We´re surrounded by knights and servants and then I´m walking through the corridors of this castle and suddenly I hear someone calling my name. When I turn around I see you smiling at me and calling me Morgana."

There was a long silence. It hung in the air heavily, making it harder to breathe.

And then Merlin broke it. The words came out like a flowing river and even if he wanted,

he couldn´t stop them. He told her everything, about the Castle, his flashbacks and this

strange feeling that had been haunting him for the last few days.

Morgana listened, and Merlin could see it in her eyes. She wasn´t thinking that he was insane,

she understood him. And that was all Merlin needed.

* * *

"I don´t know what it is." He finally ended his explanations. "It´s drawing me inside this building, inside this hall, because I feel…It´s feels like I´m…"

"Home." Morgan finished without even thinking and her eyes instantly met Merlin´s again.

They could see the confusion, the need to find out what this was all about in each other´s eyes.

"We should go to the hall." She finally said, turning on her heels and walked away from him.

It took Merlin a moment to realize and a few more seconds until he could free himself from his immovability. Then the young boy quickened his pace to keep up with her.

* * *

Morgan was standing in the middle of the Great Hall when Merlin stopped beside her. They both looked up at the same time, spotting the round table. It hung there in front of them, like a big sign. They had never seen it before though it felt so familiar and suddenly the world around them seemed to slow down. The noises blurred as if they weren´t able to reach their ears anymore.

And then it happened. Morgana gasped loudly, grabbing Merlin´s hand.

Scenes were flaring up in front of his eyes, Arthur, Uther, Gaius, Gwen and Lance, all wearing medieval clothes. The castle, the forest, and Arthur, again and again.

Suddenly he heard Morgan´s voice and she appeared in a scene, flashing in front of his eyes.

"_What was said at the woods…" she began and to his own surprise, Merlin heard himself answer._

"_You can trust me Morgana, I won´t tell anyone."_

_She gave him a little smile, small strands of her curled hair falling in her face. She looked exhausted, but happy._

"_Thank you Merlin, I know now who I really am, and it isn´t something to be scared of. Maybe one day people will come to see magic as a force for good."_

_The smile got bigger._

"_It´s...good to have you back." _

From one second to another, Merlin was thrown back into reality.

"Camelot." He heard Morgan breathe out, one hand on her chest the other one still clutching tight at his own.

"The magic." It escaped his mouth before he could even do anything.

Their heads turned to face each other.

_What is this about?_

Morgan shook her head slowly. "I…I don´t know…" and before she could even think about something else to say, they were interrupted by someone shouting their names across the entire room.

"There you are guys! I was worried about you!" It was Gwen who came running towards them, the others of their group entering the Great Hall a bit less tumultuous.

She stopped in front of them, raising one of her eyebrows.

"I´m not particularly sure if that´s my business but why are you holding hands?" Merlin and Morgan looked down, where their hands were still clutched together tightly.

"Uhm…" an awkward silence was spreading out between them as they finally let go off each other´s hands.

"I…I just felt a bit dizzy, Merlin only helped me to get my feet back on the ground."

Well, it wasn´t the best lie but it would do, especially since the truth was something you couldn´t really explain to yourself.

"Oh Morgan, I told you to eat more!" Gwen said and linked her arm with Morgan´s who looked over to Merlin a bit helplessly.

"Uhm…yeah. I didn´t have much time for breakfast today ´cause Arthur was blocking the bathroom." And that wasn´t even a lie.

"So typical of him!" the brunette shook her head. "But why were you guys in here for the first place? I mean we would have gotten in anyway."

"We…I…was searching for the toilet." Merlin said, trying to look as innocent as possible.

"Yes, me too. I thought I should follow him then."

Gwen raised an eyebrow again. "But you guys do know that the toilet is in one of the outbuildings, do you?"

"Well…now we know." And then Morgan put on one of her best smiles. "Let´s go and have a look at those paintings there!" with that she drew her best friend away from Merlin who was left alone in the middle of the Great Hall, feeling as lost as he had never felt before.

* * *

The rest of the trip was zooming by Merlin. In the end he didn´t even remember how they got back into the bus. He was just staring out of the window, watching the trees and houses passing by.

"Hey." Morgan´s voice made Merlin startle up and he turned his head.

"Uhm…hey." he answered a bit helpless.

"I´m…I´m sorry that I just disappeared but…" she stopped and Merlin could see the confusion in her eyes again.

"It´s fine." There was a long pause and neither of them said anything.

"You know…" Morgan finally said. "What happened in there…I don´t know what it was, but I know you felt it too." She grabbed his arm. "Those scenes…they seemed so familiar to me. And Camelot, it has to do with the Arthurian Legend, hasn´t it?"

Merlin could only nod.

"We need to find out what this is about!"

Again a nod. "You know we have a library at our house, my uncle has collected so many books over the years. I´m sure we can find something about the Arthurian legend there. So you…might wanna come over to my house after this trip?" it sounded weird to ask her that.

_I mean she´s the most popular girl at school!_ _This just doesn´t seem real!_

But the look in her dark eyes was making it a lot less weird, because suddenly the confusion was replaced by some kind of happiness and relief.

"Sure, we can do that."

* * *

Gaius wasn´t home when Merlin and Morgan entered the house.

"It's a really nice place you have." She said, her eyes wandering around.

"Thank you." He gave her a smile. "Uhm…so you want something to drink or eat?"

Morgan nodded. "Yes please, that would be nice. I really didn´t have anything for breakfast."

She grinned and Merlin disappeared into the kitchen to make some sandwiches.

* * *

They were spending the next hour in the library, searching through the mass of books that were there.

Unfortunately, Gaius didn´t seem to have any sense of order, at least not with his books.

It took them half an hour to find a book that just mentioned the Arthurian Legend.

After an hour Morgana finally found something and her eyes grew wide while reading the lines in the book.

"Oh my god." She let out.

Merlin turned around to face her. "What?" he asked confused.

"M…Merlin…" Morgan stuttered, her eyes shooting up to meet his. "The Arthurian Legend, it´s about us!"

* * *

"What?" he walked over to her to take a look at the book she was reading.

"It´s about us! We´re all in here. King Arthur and his only true friend, the great Sorcerer Merlin. Queen Guinevere married to King Arthur, who was having an affair with the knight Lancelot. And Morgan LeFay, also known as Morgana in her youth, the powerful witch."

Morgan paused to look at him again.

"This is us!" she pointed at the book and Merlin could see how much her hand was shaking.

This was unbelievable, they couldn´t _live_ their lives again.

_That´s not possible!_ He thought. _But…it would explain the flashes…and some other things.  
_

"I remember the castle Merlin! I remember Uther being King. But…why don´t I remember Arthur being King? He´s the one these legends are based on!"

Merlin had been asking himself this question as well. He had seen a lot of scenes with Arthur in his head, but none of them with him as the King.

"Maybe we´ll find some more things! I´ve seen a few books over there!" and with that he went over to the pile of books he had been worked on before.

* * *

It took Merlin a few minutes to find his way through the books but he finally pulled out an old looking one with a red cover.

He opened it and searched through the pages while Morgan continued to read the book she held in her hands.

"Listen Morgan!" Merlin said after a few minutes. "I think I found something!"

She looked up from her book, waiting for him to continue.

"It´s a story that has been handed down from the medieval times. It says that Prince Arthur came back from a trip to the woods one day, carrying the dead bodies of his two friends…" Merlin got slower and slower while reading. "Carrying the dead bodies of his two friends...Morgana and Merlin. Nobody ever knew what happened in the woods because Prince Arthur never talked about the incident. Shortly after that he married Guinevere and became the famous King he was. Maybe that is the reason you don´t remember him as a King, Morgan. Because you were dead!"

He looked up. "Morgan?" her body had gotten stiff and she was staring at him, eyes wide shock. The book she had been holding dropped out of her hands, making a loud noise when it hit the floor.

"W…what is wrong with you?" Merlin asked, scared.

"It…it was me." She breathed out. "It was me who caused your death!"

* * *

Now it was Merlin who was staring at her in shock. "What?"

Morgan was shaking all over.

"You…you tried to kill me and I wanted revenge!"

Suddenly imagines were flaring up in front of his eyes again. He saw Morgan, staring up at him with a shocked expression on her face. She was trying to breathe but it seemed like she wasn´t able to. And then he heard a familiar voice in his head.

_You must eradicate the source. She is dangerous!_

"I didn´t want to!" Merlin bursted out, looking at Morgan still shocked.

"What?"

"I didn´t want to kill you, doing this almost killed myself. But Morgause put a curse on Camelot and she used you as the power. I needed to kill you in order to save Camelot and Arthur´s future! But I didn´t want to kill you Morgana! You meant so much to me, you were the only one who understood how I felt about keeping the magic secret! You have no idea how happy I was when she lifted the curse in order to save you!" Merlin didn´t know where those words came from, but it felt right. This heavy feeling in his stomach was back again.

"W…what?" Morgan stared at him, one hand grabbing the edge of the table, trying not to break down. "Oh my god…" her legs started shaking terribly.

Merlin looked at Morgan, fighting the urge to run over to her and to take her in his arms.

"It…it still was my fault that you got killed! And now I don´t even have a reason for that anymore!" her eyes started to fill with tears.

"And…and I didn´t even want it anymore! You know I really wanted this revenge so bad and Morgause said she would help me. We got Mordred and followed you and Arthur into the woods."

Merlin looked at her confused, he didn´t remember any of this but he knew he wouldn´t last much longer in fighting against the urge of taking her into his arms.

"I…I wanted him to kill you but Mordred and Morgause had come up with a different plan. They knew you loved Arthur and that killing him would be a bigger torture than anything. But I didn´t want them to kill Arthur!" her eyes were getting blurry and tears started falling down her cheeks.

"Morgana…" Merlin whispered, feeling his stomach twist.

"I wanted to stop them but Mordred was using this spell to kill Arthur. But then you threw yourself in the way and you got hit by it. I screamed, I screamed so loud!" she held her hands up against her ears and shut her eyes tightly, as if she was in pain.

Suddenly, Merlin heard her scream. It was echoing inside his head and he saw her in the woods. He saw the shocked expression on her face and her desperate attempts to free herself off Morgause, who had grabbed her tight.

"Arthur bent over you and I knew Mordred would try to kill him as well. My powers worked on their own I don´t know how it happened but they threw Morgause off of me, and without even wanting to, I had killed her." Morgan paused, shaking all over, the tears still falling. "I saw Arthur´s face, he had this look in his eyes. The one I swore I would never forget my entire life. He loved you so much Merlin and it was me who destroyed everything!"  
Merlin realized how his own sight got blurry as well. He saw Arthur´s face appearing in front of him and he heard his begging voice.

_Please no, Merlin please don´t leave me! I love you, you can´t leave me!_

And suddenly everything was there again, the feeling he had for Arthur weren´t something he had made up, it hadn´t been the damn shock, it was all more than real. He still loved this guy, even after 15000 years.

"I…I really didn´t want this Merlin! All I know is…is that Mordred…he…he wanted to kill…to kill Arthur as well…and Arthur didn´t seemed…didn´t seemed to care…" she sobbed, eyes were red and her face covered with the streams of her tears.

"I…I threw myself at him and I don´t know what happened then but our…our powers must have gone…against each other and I…I think we both died…because I can´t remember…I can´t remember anything after that…" she was still sobbing and now shaking so much, Merlin thought she would break down in the next second.

"I´m…I´m so sorry Merlin, I didn´t want it to end this way! It was my entire fault!" Merlin now felt the tears running down his own cheeks.

"And I´m sorry for trying to kill you!" her dark, blurry eyes met his and this was the moment her legs gave in.

Merlin reacted within a few seconds. His feet moved on its own as he ran over to her and caught her in his arms.

They must have been a weird sight, sitting there on the ground, surrounded by books, clutching on tightly to each other with tears streaming down their faces.

"I´m sorry…" Morgan whispered and so did Merlin.

They were still in this position when Gaius opened the door to his library, seeing them sitting on the floor.

They turned their faces towards him and a small smile spread out across his face.

"It was about time."


	9. Shattered

_Ok so this is for my friend Giulia who just gave me the most amazing review on this fanfiction ever, seriously girl that one made my day! :D_

* * *

Morgan and Merlin raised their heads to face Gaius.

_He had known it all along! _Merlin suddenly thought._ He had known it since I came here, probably even longer!_

Morgan got on her feet and even though she was a bit shaky still, her feet moved by themselves. Within a few seconds she was over at the door, throwing herself into Gaius arms who caught her gladly.

"Gaius!" she sobbed, hugging him tight. "I´ve missed you!"

He nodded, hugging her back. "Me too my dear, me too."

Now Merlin was there as well and Morgan looked up, grabbing his hand.

"How long have you known?" the young boy asked and his uncle shrugged his shoulders.

"10 years, maybe 15. It only was really clear to me when I found my notes from back then. I had made sure they had been passed on over the years and this time I found them in the national library."

Merlin and Morgan stared at him, disbelieving. "Has this happened before?" the black haired girl asked and Gaius could only nod.

"Yes, only once though. According to my notes this was 1856. But destiny never brought you guys together because Arthur and you Morgana, you died in a car crash."

She kept looking at him in disbelief. "What?"

"As far as I´m concerned I still have the newspaper article in my notes. And you Merlin, I never had the chance to really meet you because your mother left the country after your father´s death."

Right now, this was just really too much to deal with. They still couldn´t even remember everything and now they were told that this was not their 2nd but their 3rd life?

"Can…can we read through your notes?" Morgan asked, still holding on tight to Merlin´s hand.

"Of course my dear. Though I would say you should get some rest first. You look tired." But before they could even answer, the doorbell rang.

"Are you expecting someone?" Merlin asked but his uncle shook his head.

"No, but I´ll be right back!" and with that Gaius was gone.

* * *

Morgan looked up into Merlin´s eyes and now and the confusion had been replaced by relief.

"I still can´t believe what just happened…" she whispered and the young boy could only nod.

"But I´m glad that I am not alone!"

Before Merlin could even think about anything to reply, they heard their names called by Gaius.

"**Could you come here for a second?**"

* * *

When they appeared at the door, they were both surprised to find Uther standing there.

It seemed as if he was about to say something, his mouth opened but nothing came out.

Seconds passed by as the older man furrowed his brows, scrutinizing his stepdaughter and Merlin.

"What happened to you? Did you cry?" he finally asked and Merlin bit his lip. He hadn´t thought about that or about something to explain it, because the truth was certainly not something they could tell Uther.

_But who expects him to show up here now?_

"We watched Titanic." He suddenly heard Morgan say and his head turned to her automatically.

His face must have looked as clueless as Uther´s, he was just glad Morgan´s father wasn´t looking at him right now.

"Yeah, Merlin and I are doing an English project together and the subject is _Greatest Love stories of all time. _And Titanic is one of the greatest."

Uther furrowed his brows again. "And it´s so sad that you have to cry?"

Now his look was resting on Merlin who managed to nod.

_Great. Now he thinks I´m a wet blanket or something…_

But what wouldn´t you do to keep a secret? _Not much._ The young boy figured out.

He had done mostly everything to keep his magic secret in the past life. He even beard to let everybody, and mostly Arthur, think that he was an idiot. And sometimes he had really felt like one.

"Well, the project doesn´t have to be finished before Monday right?" Uther´s voice brought Merlin back.

"Because I thought you guys could need some rest. So what if you and Arthur take Merlin, and of course Gwen if you want to and you make a trip to Hampshire!" he reached into his pocket and pulled out a key. A huge smile spread out on his daughter´s face.

"You didn´t…you mean we should go camping?" she asked and grabbed the keys.

"Camping?" Merlin asked, confused.

"Yeah, we used to go there when we were children. It´s a caravan at a campsite in Hampshire! It´s right at the beach and it´s beautiful there!"

Merlin could see how happy Morgan was and it must have been years since she had been there.

_I could need some rest…_ this was sure, but Merlin was torn. Of course he wanted to be with Arthur, but the blonde had no idea about their past life and he didn´t know if he could bear being so close to him without Arthur returning his feelings. And there was still this awkward moment, their almost kiss, which didn´t seem so awkward to Merlin anymore, but of course it did to Arthur.

"I…I mean if that´s really ok, it´s your caravan…" this was a desperate attempt to find an excuse, but it was cut off by Uther right there.

"Of course, it is more than ok! You saved my son´s life and this is my way to say thank you!" Merlin wasn´t sure if that was a smile on Uther´s face but the young boy could feel how relieved he was, that his son was ok.

_If he only knew how many times I´ve saved Arthur´s life…_ Merlin thought._ I don´t even think he really knew my name back then…_

"Ok sounds great! I´ll call Gwen and we´ll pick you up, let´s say…in about an hour?" This was more of a remark than a question and with that Morgan gave him a kiss on the cheek and disappeared.

Merlin couldn´t prevent a smile from spreading out across his face.

* * *

Merlin was sitting in the backseat of Arthur´s car with Morgan next to him. Gwen was driving with Lance because they had decided that one car was not enough for all five of them and their luggage.

Merlin´s eyes watched the landscape passing by outside the window, when he suddenly felt his hand being grabbed and he looked over to Morgan who was giving him a smile. He smiled back.

_Maybe it´s not gonna be so bad… _he thought while his eyes wandered around the car.

And then he met Arthur´s in the rearview mirror.

_Ouch. _Merlin flinched, if looks could kill he would be dead by now.

_Is he really that mad about…this almost kiss?_

He jerked his eyes away and scrunched himself up into his seat, this wouldn´t be an easy weekend that was for sure.

* * *

After an almost an hour Merlin could see the sea passing by outside his window and he felt the tension loosen up a bit. He wouldn´t have to stay close to Arthur all the time.

He could just spend his time with Gwen or Morgan. Or even with Lance, he had always been on Merlin´s side.

_He knew about my secret and didn´t betray me…_ Merlin thought as they passed a sign with the inscription _Kingfisher Caravan Park._

Just when the cars stopped in the parking lot Morgan opened her door very quickly and jumped out.

"I´ll do the registration!" and before Arthur could even protest, she was gone.

The blonde sighed and sunk back into his seat. She was way too happy for him, he wasn´t sure if he could bear that all weekend long.

_And why does she have to leave me here with HIM?_

He never thought he would be jealous of his sister, and certainly not because of her boyf…

_God Arthur Pendragon would you just stop thinking about stuff like that?_

Meanwhile Merlin started to feel uncomfortable. The heavy silence between them hung in the air and the young boy didn´t dare to look up because he know he couldn´t do this look in Arthur´s eyes again.

Thankfully, Morgan was back very quickly and they could make their way to the Pendragon caravan.

It was pretty big and luxurious, which didn´t surprise Merlin.

Suddenly he felt something missing inside and his stomach began twisting again. He heard Arthur´s voice in his mind.

_Make the bed! Polish my armor, clean the floor!_

He had never particularly liked to do it, but now he realized how much he actually missed it because it had always brought him close to Arthur.

"We used to come here when we were children…" Morgan appeared next to Merlin and he startled up a bit. "But we never came back after my mom died. I didn´t even know Uther kept this place for all these years." He could hear the sadness in her voice but he also felt how happy she was to be back here.

"Arthur and I spend most of our time at the beach, building sandcastles and flying kites. " she smiled again. "And Uther and Mom needed to be there with us all the time because we always had something to show to them."

Now Merlin had to smile as well, he could see them running around at the beach, all happy and excited about their sandcastles.

His smile vanished when he saw Arthur leaving the caravan after he had put their luggage in it.

_I can´t even stand looking at him! _He thought as his stomach twisted and he turned away.

It was hard to love someone who didn´t love you back. But it was harder to love someone who didn´t remember that he loved you.

* * *

They had decided, or let´s say Morgan and Gwen had decided, because they were already in their bikini´s, that they would spend the rest of the day at the beach.

The fresh water made Merlin feel a bit better, it was somehow freezing the pain in his stomach and he was able to forget about everything, just for the moment he dived under water.

The problem was just that it was all there again when he broke through the surface. He saw pictures of Arthur and him kissing in his head, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn´t remember how it felt.

Just when Merlin had rubbed the water out of his eyes he felt something behind him.

It was Morgan who appeared from underwater, jumping on his back with arms clasping around his torso and resting her head on his shoulder.

He couldn´t prevent a grin from appearing on his own face when he saw her cheeky smile.

_At least one of us is happy._ He thought. _And she really deserves it._

Maybe Arthur was his destiny, but that didn´t seem to mean that they would live happily ever after or something.

* * *

While Morgan, Lance, Arthur and Gwen were still in the water, Merlin was back at their towels.

He sat there, staring at the waves crashing on the beach, not paying attention to what was happening around him. That was probably why he didn´t notice Arthur when he sat down beside him.

"So…" the blonde began and Merlin startled up.

_What?_ But he didn´t dare to turn his head. _Is he actually talking to me?_

Somehow Merlin felt that this wasn´t going to be a good and happy conversation.

"So…" Arthur began again. "You and my sister?"

Now Merlin turned his head in surprise, which was a mistake. He was looking directly in to Arthur´s eyes. There was no anger or thread in them, but the bright blue had already tantalized him again.

He remembered sinking into those blue eyes so many times, those wonderful eyes sometimes full of passion and love and sometimes full of hurt or fear.

He wanted Arthur back, he wanted him so much that it hurt.

He wanted to remember how it felt to be in his arms, to touch and kiss him.

"You know, I´m fine with it. Just don´t…hurt her, ok?"

And there it was. _I´m fine with it._ It was then that Merlin´s heart shattered into a million pieces.

But after all, what did he expect?


	10. Flying Kites

_Wohoo, another chapter! =) Hope you guys still like to read it!_

I´ve posted a Trailer for this on Youtube, my crappy attempt to do one! XD If you want, check it out! =)

_

* * *

_

They were sitting in front of the Caravan, watching the sunset. Gwen was snuggling into Lance and Morgana was sitting pretty close to Merlin.

He didn´t mind, it was over anyway.

_I only need to find a way to deal with it…_

The memories of Arthur and him, the happy ones, where ghosting around in his head. They were all there, so close as if he just needed to reach out and he would be able to touch them, to _feel_ them.

Merlin wanted this more than anything, to remember how it felt to touch Arthur. How it felt to be in his arms and to kiss his soft lips. Hearing his own name, whispered into his ear by the prince.

But this all seemed so far away now. It was unattainable to him, he would never be able to feel Arthur like this anymore, his memory was all that Merlin had left and even there he couldn´t remember how it really felt.

"Merlin? Merlin I´m talking to you!" he heard his name and was thrown back into reality.

"W...what?" Merlin looked over to Lance who he assumed had just talked to him.

"I asked if you want a beer or if you prefer the girls drink."

_God…coming here wasn´t a good idea at all. _Merlin thought,but he had chosen to join them so it was his own fault. This was one of the moments when he felt like a real idiot.

"Girls drink?" he then asked, because he couldn´t think of anything better.

"Red wine." Lance answered and pointed at the glasses the girls were holding in their hands.

"Uhm…I´ll take the beer, thanks." Actually, he didn´t really wanted to drink anything.

_But maybe it will help to escape this goddamn mess I have gotten in… _he thought and took the bottle Lance was offering.

* * *

It wasn´t helping at all, Merlin didn´t feel any dizzy, not even after 3 beers.

When they finally decided to go to bed Merlin wasn´t able to sleep, and it wasn´t only because he had to sleep on the couch. There was one double bed which they had left to Gwen and Lance and two single beds which were occupied by Morgan and Arthur.

Morgan had offered him her bed but Merlin didn´t mind the couch since he knew he wouldn´t sleep much anyway.

Now he was lying there, staring up at the ceiling. Pictures were dancing in front of his eyes, pictures of Arthur, of course.

_This is so stupid…_ he thought._ Why am I doing this to myself?_

But there was no answer to this question. He couldn´t fight these pictures or his feelings. And there was this one side of him who didn´t wanted to forget Arthur. Although he knew that this was pure torture.

_Fuck._

As Arthur´s blue eyes started to appear, Merlin had enough and got up.

"I need some fresh air..." he murmured and opened the caravan door.

* * *

"Can´t sleep, hm?" he suddenly heard a voice and almost fell down the two steps he was just about to walk down.

Lance was sitting in a chair and if Merlin wouldn´t have seen him go to bed, he would think that the young boy hadn´t moved at all.

"Sit down." And Merlin sat down. Actually he had planned to go for a walk but he would probably get lost anyway.

_Not that Arthur would care…_ he sighed. _But Morgan would, and Gwen._

They sat there in silence for awhile, staring out into the night.

Merlin really tried to think about something to say but it didn´t seem as if something meaningful wanted to come to his mind.

"It´s hard, isn´t it?" he suddenly heard Lance´s voice and turned his head. "But it will be alright."

_What is he talking about? _The black haired boy was confused.

"Being in love isn´t easy at all, and certainly not if the person you love doesn´t remember."

Merlin´s eyes grew wide within a second and his heartbeat accelerated.

_What? How does he…he can´t possibly…_

Lance turned his head, smiling at him absently. "I can tell from the way you look at him, you know, and how you interact with Morgan. You didn´t know from the beginning, did you?"

Merlin could only shake his head in shock and disbelief.

"I remembered everything when I saw Gwen for the first time, it seems like this woman is my destiny. But...I really know how you feel, Merlin." Now he was focusing him. "She was with Arthur back then and it broke my heart. But it worked out in the end, just don´t give up!"

Merlin was still shocked that Lance knew.

_I can´t believe it…_ he thought. _But why is it that of all people Arthur and Gwen don´t remember?_

"Arthur loved you so much Merlin. After he brought you and Morgana´s bodies back to the castle he didn´t talk to anyone for 3 weeks. He then married Gwen, but they were never really happy because all he could think about was you. She wasn´t mad at him, not at all, this was also when we started our affair, and he didn´t even mind."

Merlin felt his eyes filling with tears but he tried to hold them back.

"Just don´t stop trying, ok? It will be all right. And don´t worry, your secrets are safe with me, they´ve always been." With that, Lance got up and disappeared into the caravan, but not without patting Merlin on the shoulder.

The young boy stared out into the night, still feeling the touch of Lance on his shoulder.

_I can trust him…_ that was for sure. _But how can I not stop trying if Arthur only gives me looks that I can´t stand?_

It was breaking his heart and Merlin couldn´t do anything against it.

* * *

He must have fallen asleep, because when Merlin opened his eyes, the sun was already rising. His hands wandered up, massaging his shoulders which hurt from the uncomfortable position he had slept in.

The sunrise was beautiful, the sky was colored in orange and red and for a moment Merlin thought that it may all end up in a good way. Unfortunately this feeling didn´t last very long.

_Just don´t stop trying, ok? _Lance voice was echoing in his head.

And Merlin didn´t want to stop trying but he didn´t know what to do.

* * *

After breakfast, they decided to go to the beach and fly the kites they had found in the caravan.

Gwen and Morgan seemed to have the time of their lives while Arthur was sitting on the blanket they had brought.

Merlin was standing next to Gwen, watching her kite flying up high in the air. Lance was there as well, giving him an encouraging smile from time to time.

_This isn´t helping at all…_

He gazed at Arthur which didn´t seem to care about him or the kites at all.

Merlin didn´t know what to do, he couldn´t possibly talk to Arthur, he wasn´t even able to get any closer to him. His fear of being rejected kept him right where he was.

"**Gwen? Can you help me with my kite?"** he heard Morgan shouting across the beach and suddenly Merlin felt the cords of the kite pressed into his hands and Gwen and Lance disappeared into Morgan´s direction.

"What…?"

He was so surprised and inexperienced with it that the kite crashed just a few seconds later.

It came down right next to Lance who startled up.

"So…sorry!" Merlin stuttered and looked helplessly into his friend´s direction.

"No Problem!" and with that Lance grabbed the kite and brought it back up in the air.

Merlin, still not knowing what to do since he had never done this before, just gestured helplessly with his hands and the kite crashed again.

_Great…_ Everything seemed to go wrong these days.

"You really don´t know how to do this, do you?" Merlin´s heart skipped a beat as he suddenly heard Arthur´s voice somewhere near his ear. The blonde had appeared behind him and his presence alone caused Merlin to get goose bumps all over his arms and his back.

"**Lance? Could you?**" Arthur shouted and Lance turned around, walking a few steps into their direction, bringing up the kite again.

"You have to keep the balance and have an eye on the wind!"

Merlin´s hands were shaking and it wasn´t helping that Arthur was now bringing his arms forward, practically capturing the young boy in between them.

The blonde then covered Merlin´s hands with his and the black haired boy needed to bite his lip in order not to gasp.

_This_ was how it felt. His stomach was doing flips, his heartbeat was a lot faster than usual and his head was spinning because he could not only touch, but _smell_ Arthur. This unmistakable and familiar smell, Merlin had missed it so much.

He closed his eyes to capture all of this, Arthur´s presence, his touch and his smell.

* * *

Arthur didn´t know why he had even got up from the blanket, probably because Merlin had looked so helpless with the kite. The blonde had felt this sudden urge to help him.

Right now he wasn´t sure if was regretting that he had touched Merlin or that he had put his hands on the other boy´s.

_But…but it feels…so…_ familiar. And it felt _…right?_

No this couldn´t be, this was just rubbish!

Suddenly, Merlin leaned back against Arthur´s chest.

_God._ His hands tightened automatically around Merlin´s and the kite began to shake dangerously. It felt as if an electric shock was going right through Arthur´s whole body.

It took him several seconds to get his mind straight again.

"I…I…well that´s how it works then."

And suddenly Arthur was gone. Merlin could still feel the warmth of his body as the kite crashed once again.


	11. You have been the One for me

_Sorry for taking so long to update! XD I hope you´re still reading this and leave me a comment! =)_

_This is for Cynthia because she waited so patiently and I love our awesome conversations on msn! ;D 3_

_Oh and I highly recommend not to read this while listening to any sad song, my radio decided to play "Goodbye my lover" by James Blunt while I wrote this. Wasn´t healthy at all. XD

* * *

_

Merlin could still feel Arthur´s touch from earlier, even if they were already back at the caravan, preparing everything for the barbecue they had planned.

He thought that maybe spending a weekend with him would be good but right now Merlin was more than convinced that this hadn´t been a good idea at all.

The heavy feeling in his stomach was getting more unbearable with every minute he spent close to the blonde, especially now since he remembered how it felt to touch Arthur. Although that wasn´t the worst part of it all. The worst part was to watch Arthur and to know, to always be reminded that he didn´t remember. And that he would never.

_I always had flashbacks and remembered parts when I was in the great hall…and Arthur felt nothing. At least he didn´t look like it. _

Merlin was setting the table absent minded, his eyes trailing off to the distance, watching the sky where the sun was already setting.

Sometimes he wished that he was dreaming. That he would just wake up in Camelot within the next few seconds, with Arthur curled up next to him, giving him that gorgeous, sleepy smile he used to get every morning.

_It´s not fair…_

"Merlin? **Merlin**?" he suddenly heard his own name and turned around, almost knocking a glass off the table.

Morgan caught it before it hit the ground. "Sorry." They both said at the same time and then gave each other a smile.

"Are you ok?" Merlin´s smile vanished. Of course he wasn´t, and Morgan knew that.

But she was concerned about him, and he was grateful for that.

"Ok, can you turn the grill on? I need to get up to the kiosk and see if they got any bread cause we don´t have anything left. Arthur is not moving from the bed and Gwen and Lance are still at the beach somewhere. So there´s just you left!"

Merlin only nodded when Morgan gave him another smile and left.

He sighed with his eyes on the caravan door, thinking about what to say if Arthur would walk out of it now. But his mind was empty.

_Great. _he thought. _Really great._

He would be so relieved if this was actually over. And hey, there was only one year left at High School. He would survive that, somehow.

It was then that the heavy feeling came back, twisting his stomach and Merlin sucked in his breath very hard.

This needed to stop. He needed to…

"Can´t turn on the grill Merlin?" he suddenly heard and jumped a little.

"Arthur!" he breathed out.

"Yeah, that´s my name. See, you need to turn this…" and with that he took Merlin´s hand into his own and to the button but the black haired boy jerked back.

"DON´T touch me!" those words escaped his mouth before Merlin could do something against it.

_Oh no!_ he wanted Arthur to touch him, of course but his heart was resisting, screaming _NO_ with every beat, because this was more than it could bear. More than Merlin could deal with.

"What is your problem?" Arthur snapped back, but not making a move.

"It´s…it´s…" Merlin couldn´t bring himself to finish the sentence. He couldn´t possibly tell Arthur the truth. The blonde would think that he was going insane. And Merlin wouldn´t even blame him for that since he would have probably not believed a word if someone had tried to tell him that he had been the a great sorcerer back in the medieval times and in love with Arthur Pendragon, one of the greatest Kings of England.

"What is it? Seriously talk to me!" Merlin sucked in his breath again, eye filling with tears, staring into Arthur´s.

"I can´t!" and with that he walked away, leaving the blonde behind.

* * *

Fortunately, the kiosk was still open when Morgan arrived so she would be able to buy some bread.

"I…no listen this is really important. I´m looking for Arthur Pendragon. I know you usually can´t tell me but this is…"

Morgan stopped and turned her head, watching a man standing at the registration, trying to convince the man on the other side of the window.

"What do you want from him?" she heard herself say and the man turned to her.

"Excuse me?" he asked, scrutinizing her.

"What do you want from Arthur?" Morgan repeated.

"Oh, well I work for the University of London and we received an application from Mr. Pendragon. Unfortunately he forgot to sign the most important paper and we can´t accept his application without that. So I came to get it."

Now Morgan was scrutinizing the man. "And you came all the way from London for that? How do you know we were here?"

The man took a few steps closer to her. "I talked to his father Uther Pendragon. He thought it was important that his son applied to our University which is, if I may add, one of the bests in this country. And it would also be a pity if Mr. Pendragon couldn´t study at our University because his application was by far one of the bests we got."

This made sense, at least the part with Uther_. He would have sent a chauffeur to get Arthur to London to sign this application. _She thought. Although she wasn´t so sure about Arthur being the best applicant.

_But actually I´ve never really paid attention to his grades that much…_

"So, can you help me?"

She snapped back into reality. "Oh, of course. You need to get around the corner there, then walk down the hill, turn left and just walk straight for about 3 minutes. Our caravan is the big one on the right side."

The man gave her a smile. "Thank you, Morgan." And with that he disappeared.

* * *

"**Merlin, WAIT!"** Arthur yelled as the black haired boy had just reached the bottom of the hill that lead to the registration, the parking lot and the kiosk. He didn´t know where he was going, just away, away from Arthur. He really couldn´t deal with this anymore.

"**Bloody hell Just wait!"** it was then that the blonde finally got to grab Merlin´s shirt and forced him to stop.

"What?" he blurted out sharply. Tears were already coming again, filling his eyes.

"I…I don´t know." Arthur panted, letting go off Merlin´s shirt and staring at him.

Great, so this was it? It really had to end in a bad way hadn´t it?

_I could have, no I should have just stayed away from him!_

"I should have stayed at home. I should have never come to Winchester and I would have never remembered all of this…" He murmured, drawing his eyes away from Arthur´s.

"What?" the blonde asked confused.

"Nothing."

"Merlin, I need you to talk to me! I mean there are those strange things happening between us…"

He wanted to run, he wanted to be somewhere else now but while Arthur was talking the feeling in his stomach was getting stronger and stronger, stretching out across his chest making his heart ache so much.

"Strange things?" Merlin asked, forcing his eyes to look back at Arthur.

"How can you call it like that? Oh right, because I´m the only bloody person to remember what happened am I? Cause it was always me who had to suffer! It was always me but it was ok because it was my damn destiny to protect you! But when I realized that you cared about me a great deal! Everything was perfect Arthur! **Too fucking perfect!**" Merlin didn´t know what he was doing anymore, he couldn´t hold back the tears now. They were just coming, running down his cheeks, leaving traces there.

Arthur just stared at him, shocked and confused.

"**You and I are not destined to end up together, not then and not now. But you have no idea how I feel, you have no idea how it feels to love someone who doesn´t know that he loves you back!"** Merlin´s voice broke, his chest raising quickly and heavily.

The words came flowing out, just like the tears. Arthur would never understand, he would think that Merlin was insane but that didn´t matter anymore. It was over anyway.

"Arthur Pendragon." They suddenly heard a voice and a man, dressed in a black suit, appeared behind Merlin.

* * *

While walking out of the kiosk, Morgan thought of the man she had just showed the way to their caravan. He had looked strangely familiar to her but she couldn´t tell from where she knew him.

_Where could I…_

"Wait…" she suddenly murmured. "He called me Morgan, I never…"

And suddenly scenes were flashing up in front of her.

"_Here she comes, our sweet little Morgan. You´ve grown up so much just like Jessica, how old are you?"_

"_I`m 4!"_ _Morgan heard herself say very proud._

Another flash.

"_Daddy, where is Mr. Anderson?" _

_Uther looked down at her. "He needed to leave, he took money from the office. He wasn´t allowed doing that." _

"_But what is gonna happen to his daughter? She was my friend!"_

"_I don´t know Darling. Look, Daddy needs to work now. I need to find a new finance minister."_

Morgan sucked in her breath harshly and her legs were starting to give away.

Then another flash appeared. The face of the man she had just spoken to.

"_You´ll regret this Uther Pendragon. I´ll get my revenge, you won´t know when and where, but it´ll be dreadful."_

"Arthur." Morgan dropped the bread she was holding in her hands and ran.

* * *

"Who are you?" Arthur asked and Merlin turned around to face the man.

"It doesn´t matter. What does matter is that I´ll get what I want. I told Uther this would happen. I just didn´t think it would be this easy." An almost ironic smile appeared on his face and he let out a laugh.

"I don´t understand." Arthur replied even more confused that he had been before.

"You don´t have to my dear. Uther took my job and my wife left me, taking my beautiful daughter with her. I just want what I deserve, revenge. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth."

Merlin saw the gun that the man was pulling out of his jacket first.

It was then that Morgan appeared at the top of the hill, screaming Arthur´s name.

Merlin did the same as the man lifted the gun.

"**Arthur no!" **

Morgan stopped running half way done the hill when the shot rang out.

But it wasn´t Arthur that was hit by it.

The blonde saw Merlin tremble, grabbing the blondes shoulders with his eyes open wide in shock, glancing at him, mouth opened just a little as if he wanted to cry out but couldn´t.

The gun was still pointed in their direction when suddenly someone threw himself against the man, tearing him down to the ground, it was Lance.

They heard Gwen cry out and suddenly there was silence. A deadly silence that was starting to lay upon the campsite.

Arthur was in shock, he couldn´t tear his eyes away from his friend, what just happened hadn´t reached his mind yet.

When Merlin legs finally gave away then, Arthur caught him and suddenly it was all there.

Every single picture and every feeling of their past life together. It came to Arthur, overwhelming him, filling his entire head and body. He heard Merlin´s voice, felt his touch.

The black haired boy was lying in his arms, breathing heavily. This was too much of a déjà vu.

"**Merlin, Merlin**!" Arthur cried out. "**Don´t, please don´t leave me here! I can´t deal with loosing you again! I love you!**" now tears were streaming down his face, landing on Merlin´s clothes which were already colored red from blood.

"You….you´re…such…a…prat…" Merlin breathed, words coming out of his mouth slowly.

"What?" Arthur almost needed to laugh about that.

"You always…safe…everything…for last…don´t…you…." He tried to smile but the pain was spreading out across his whole body, making it almost impossible to talk or move.

"**No please don´t say things like that! It´s gonna be ok! **Everything is gonna be alright! For how long have you known? Wait it doesn´t matter. I…I was an idiot for not…for not seeing the signs! The almost kiss…the touches, the…Merlin?" Arthur´s voice got more quiet and shaky with every word he spoke. His chest was raising and sinking quickly, heart racing way too fast.

Morgan just stood there on the exact point where she had stopped. She wasn´t moving at all, just staring at the scene that was playing out before here. It was like a bad comedy.

Tears were streaming down her face but she wasn´t reacting to them. All she could think was

_I did it again._

She wasn´t even reacting when the paramedics ran past her, brushing against her, making her begin to waver.

Not even when Gwen was beside her, taking the black haired girl in her arms, pressing her own face against her shoulder.

Meanwhile Arthur had grabbed Merlin´s hand, brushing his face with the other. His fingers were curling up in the black hair and tracing the lines the tears had left until his sight got blurred by his own tears.

"You can´t leave me, do you hear me?" he whispered, because his voice was refusing to do anything more than that.

This couldn´t be the end. This was not how it was _supposed _to end!

_It isn´t fair!_

Arthur remembered the time after _the _day. The day he had lost Merlin and Morgana. How hollow he had felt. The bed, made up on the other side, so empty and cold. Even with Gwen in it, it still hadn´t been the same. Merlin smile and laughter that had haunted him in his dreams, leaving a numb pain in Arthur´s chest when he woke up, had always been there. No this wasn´t fair, not at all.

"Merlin…" he whispered once again, lowering his head, resting their foreheads against each other. "Merlin…I love you. I always have." Arthur then placed a soft his on the other boy´s lips and felt Merlin responding to it weakly.

"I love you so much…"

When Arthur lifted his head up again, Merlin could see the desperation and helplessness in his eyes. But he could also see the love the blonde had for him. Didn´t people always say it was important that the last face you see before you die is the face of a friend? He was lucky then, wasn´t he? The last face he would see was the face of Arthur Pendragon. The biggest prat on earth, and oblivious idiot and clotpole, but most of all the love of his life. He lifted his hand and pain shoot up his entire body, but Merlin didn´t stop before he had reached Arthur´s shirt. His hand clung into the cloth, as if it would never want to let go.

"Well…maybe…in the…next life…yeah?" Merlin´s voice cracked up and his breath was going heavy, but still, he tried to smile.

"**Merlin!**" the blonde cried out once more before his voice finally refused to work just one second longer.

"Arthur? I…I love…you…" was the last thing he heard from Merlin before his eyes shut and all tension vanished from his body, the hand that had clung to Arthur´s shirt falling down lifelessy.


	12. All I wanna be now is beside you

_Ok sooooooo this is the last chapter. Honestly I can´t believe it´s over already but on the other side I never planned so many chapters, I thought about 5 or something. But I kind of love how this story turned out and I thank you all for sticking to it and leaving comments! =)  
Special thanks to Cynthia whose comments always make my day! And of course you were a great help with all our long aaaaaaaaand well, you know what, conversations til 4 am on msn! :P Love you._

_Ok sooo just so you know, this chapter is gonna contain mature content so if you´re offended by that, don´t read!  
But I guess you´ve been all waiting for that haven´t you? :P_

_Enjoy and leave a comment please!_

_xoxo Laura

* * *

_

When Arthur opened his eyes he knew that something was wrong.

"What…what happened?" he whispered weakly.

"**Arthur!**" a familiar voice responded a bit too loud and a sudden pain shot up into his head.

After it had disappeared his eyes wandered to the right where someone had grabbed his hand.

"Guinevere."

The black haired girl sat by his side, her eyes filled with relief and a smile spread out across her face while she was squeezing his hand.

"We were so worried! You just blacked out!"

And suddenly everything was there. The hospital room blurred in front of his eyes and all he could see was Merlin.

A shot rang out and filled his head, making Arthur want to press his hands against it to stop that torturing noise.

"No, no, no…" he whispered, his breath going heavy.

Merlin fell, he fell right into his arms, giving Arthur this desperate look.

"_Maybe…in the…next life…yeah?"_

This sentence echoed in his head making his eyes fill with tears.

He squeezed them shut, hearing Gwen whisper quietly.

"Oh Arthur…"

And then he fell back into a dark, black hole.

* * *

When he opened his eyes they closed again immediately because he was blinded by the brightness.

The young boy blinked a few times, his sight blurry, trying to figure out where he was and what had happened.

Suddenly a somehow familiar face got into his sight and he was trying hard to focus on it.

"Merlin!" he heard and came to the conclusion that this must be his name.

"Where…where am I?" he murmured, sight still blurry.

"You´re at the hospital! Oh Merlin I thought I would have gotten you killed again!"

He blinked a few times, eyes adjusting to the light.

"Killed again? What are you talking about and who are…" it was then that he saw her, the girl with the long black hair, dark eyes and her expression frozen.

"Merlin you…you do know who I am don´t you?" she asked, voice cracking.

_Those eyes…_ he thought._ They seem so…familiar._

Merlin knew that he should remember who this girl was and his head began to ache from his attempts to do so.

Morgan hadn't moved at all and she was still staring down at her friend.

No, it couldn´t possibly be true that he _forgot_. Not after all they had been through now!

"Merlin…" she whispered, her eyes filling with tears and she failed at holding them back.

Morgan felt the urge to tell him everything, to tell him about Camelot, Arthur and the moments in the library, just everything, but she knew that he would probably think that she was going insane or something so she just stood there, tears running down her cheeks.

"Please, Merlin…" the black haired boy heard her whisper and suddenly felt his chest tightening.

He couldn´t see her cry without any reason, at least no reason he knew about.

"I…please…please don´t cry Morgana!" he said without thinking and suddenly he could see a spark lightening up her blurred eyes.

"Merlin you, you just called me Morgana!" the young girl said and grabbed his hand.

That was the moment it hit him. Every single picture appeared in front of his eyes.

Merlin felt his heartbeat accelerate and gasped for breath.

_Arthur._

That was all he could think of and his head felt as if it was going to explode any second from all the images and voices that were racing in it.

"Merlin! **Merlin! Oh my god!**" he heard and suddenly felt a hard grip on his shoulders.

"**Merlin!"** then everything went black.

* * *

"The next time he woke up, he felt something heavy pressing on his right hand and he turned his head, eyes opening slightly not to get blinded again.

"Morgana…" he whispered, seeing the black haired girl by his side, her hand tightened around his own, resting her head on it.

More as a reflex, he squeezed her hand, a slight smile appearing on his face.

Then his eyes wandered around the room. It was painted yellow, had grey linoleum on the floor and Merlin noticed all the cards and flowers that were in the room. They seemed to be everywhere, on every free table and chair.

He then realized that this room was quite big and that there was no other bed in it.

_But…I could never…_

His thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice, and this time he really knew to whom it belonged.

"My dad made sure you would get the best treatment that was possible."

Merlin turned his head, facing Morgan. He could still see the traces the tears had left on her face but she was smiling at him and that was all that mattered.

"I´m sorry." She then said, squeezing his hand tightly.

"For what?" Merlin asked a bit confused.

""For...for sending that guy to you. I should have known…" she whispered, the smile disappearing slowly.

The young boy remembered. The imagines were coming to him and they were surprisingly clear.

"No Morgana." Somehow he was used to call her that way now. "It wasn´t your fault at all, you couldn´t have known and I´m certainly not blaming you. Everything is all right."

Morgan´s face lit up again and she bent down to kiss Merlin on the forehead.

"Thank you." She whispered.

Their moment was ended by a knock on the door. But whoever knocked didn´t seem to bother waiting for an answer because the door opened immediately.

Merlin´s heart skipped a beat when he saw Arthur appearing. The blonde looked pale and exhausted, but the look on his face when he saw him was something Merlin would never forget.

"I´ll be with Gwen." He heard Morgan say and just nodded as she made her way out of the room, just stopping next to Arthur to give him a quick kiss on cheek. Arthur was a little surprised since she hadn´t done this for years but returned it with a smile.

He then walked over to Merlin´s bed, stopping at the edge, hesitating what to do next.

"Arthur…" Merlin whispered, his eyes wandering up to meet the blonde´s.

_I thought I would never see those blue eyes again…_

He couldn´t describe how he felt right now, there were too many emotions involved to explain.

"I thought I lost you." Arthur whispered back, eyes starting to fill with tears.

"You´re not gonna get rid of me so easily, you know." Merlin smirked.

"Idiot. Who was the one telling me about _maybe next life_? I´ve waited long enough for you, so don´t you…"

"You´re a prat Arthur, always have and always will be." The black haired boy interrupted him, still smirking.

"You know, I was right." The blonde came closer and Merlin´s heart began to race.

"I really didn´t need a servant in the next life. I just need you."

And then he leant forward, pressing a soft kiss to Merlin´s lips.

"And for the love of Camelot, I´m not going to let you get away again!"

Merlin smiled against Arthur´s lips and a warm feeling was spreading out across his whole body.

Because maybe after all, they deserved their happy ending.

* * *

After Merlin had fully recovered, Uther had invited everybody to have dinner at his house.

Everyone was having a good time, chatting and laughing.

Especially Gaius and Uther were immersed into a conversation, which was probably the reason why they didn´t notice Merlin disappearing, followed by Arthur only a minute later.

Morgan and Lance noticed, of course, but they kept quiet, giving each other a knowing smile instead.

It was by the time the dessert arrived when Uther noticed that the boys were gone.

He looked around the room before turning to Morgan. "Where did they go?" he asked and she tried to put on the most serious expression she could manage.

"They were tired Dad. I think they just went for a nap. They still get tired very easy, you know."

Uther only nodded and waited until his daughter was busy chatting with Gwen again, then a small smile spread out across his face.

They wouldn´t need to keep it a secret, not because of him. They would have never had to.

Because if there was one thing that Uther Pendragon understood, it was how his son felt. To have this one man he trusted so deeply, the one he would give his life for, the one who protected him and was always there for him, during his youth and even after his wife died.

Yes, he knew how Arthur felt. The smile stayed right where it was when he turned his head to Gaius, continuing their conversation from earlier.

* * *

They were sitting on Arthur´s bed, hands intertwined between them, both staring at the opposite wall.

They knew what was going to happen eventually but neither of them really had the courage to start anything.

When Arthur finally turned his head and gathered all his courage to say something, he didn´t make it any further than _Merl_ because the black haired boys eyes he was looking into right now, were delivering so many emotions, it took his breath away. Arthur saw love, happiness, lust, want, even a bit of fear, exactly what he was feeling and for a moment he wondered if Merlin was seeing the same emotions in his eyes.

"Arthur…" he whispered, leaning forward until their lips touched.

It was a tender kiss and yet so full of passion and love. It was overwhelming both boys, causing Arthur to let out a soft moan as they broke apart. The blonde shuddered from delight, causing Merlin to chuckle slightly.

"You´re getting goose bumps." He said with a soft smile on his face.

"Idiot." Arthur mumbled back, but couldn´t prevent a small smile to spread out across his own face.

Seeing Merlin here, being able to touch him and to know that this was real filled Arthur´s heart with so much warmth and joy that he thought he would start crying on the very instant.

_God Arthur Pendragon, you´re acting like a girl! _He told himself, but then realized that he didn´t care, not at all.

"I love you so much…" he whispered, resting their foreheads together.

"I really thought I lost you again."

Merlin grabbed Arthur´s hand and squeezed it tight. "You won´t get rid of me that easy, I told you." He said, causing Arthur to laugh this time.

"You were right as well Merlin." The blonde said smiling.

"About what?" the black haired boy asked.

"You are never going to change. Not even after 14.000 years."

Now Merlin laughed as well. It was weird how close those old days seemed to be, he couldn´t believe that it had been such a long time. It felt as if it had just been yesterday that he arrived in Camelot, stumbling into Arthur by accident.

The blonde was tracing his fingers up and down Merlin´s cheek, running them through his hair so that it was his turn to shudder now. "I want you." It escaped his mouth before he even realized what he had said.

Arthur stopped, looking into those beautiful blue eyes again. "Are you sure? We don´t have to do anything you don´t want to."

Merlin smiled, nodding slightly. "Oh Arthur, I´ve been waiting for this what, like 14.000 years? Just get on with it!"

A smirk appeared on the blondes face after hearing those words.

_He´s right, we´ve been waiting far too long for this!_

And with that he pushed Merlin back on the bed, steadying himself above him.

Arthur then bent down to kiss Merlin´s neck and to breathe against it slowly. The black haired boy shuddered from delight and stretched his head back to give Arthur more access.

This offer was taken gladly by the blonde who now bit down Merlin´s ear.

"You´re the only one I want…" he whispered in between kisses and those words went straight to Merlin´s cock who was already half hard. His arms wandered up, fingers tracing along Arthur´s sides, leaving goose bumps wherever they went.

The blonde shuddered, lifting his head just to stare into those eternal blue eyes. His breath was hot against Merlin´s cheek when he bent down again to kiss him. Their mouths crashed together and Merlin bit Arthur´s bottom lip causing the blonde to moan. He then slipped his tongue inside, tasting him and feeling the intensity of their kiss growing.

Within a few seconds their shirts were taken off and thrown across the room. Arthur was devoting himself to Merlin´s neck again, kissing further down his collarbone and then licking one of his nipples, causing the black haired boy to gasp loudly. Pleased with this reaction, the blonde repeated his action and Merlin was running his hands through Arthur´s hair, already feeling slightly dizzy.

The blonde made his way further down, placing kisses on every inch of skin he could reach. He continued kissing while he fumbled on Merlin´s jeans, pushing them down along with his boxers, revealing his now fully hard cock. The jeans and boxers were thrown off the bed, joining their shirts on the floor.

Arthur then bent down, licking the underside of Merlin´s cock.

"Oh my god." it slipped past the black haired boy´s lips as he clenched his hands around the bed sheets.

He remembered how it used to feel like, but this was more intense then Merlin had expected. His body was on fire and he wanted Arthur more than anything in this entire world.

"Hah…" he moaned as the blonde kept licking his cock, twisting his tongue around the head of it.

Arthur then worked his way up again, stopping right over Merlin´s hips, just where the bullet had entered his body. He kissed the scar that was still visible clearly and traced his fingers along it.

"I love you." He breathed quietly and Merlin grabbed his face with both hands, bringing it up to him just to place kisses all over it. Arthur´s cheeks, his nose, his chin and his temples. He then flipped the blonde over so he was on top. Arthur stared up again and this look in his eyes was almost too much for Merlin to bear. He brought their lips together, tasting as much of Arthur as he could. He then kissed and licked down the blonde's neck, causing Arthur to moan and to arch his back. The blonde couldn´t keep his hips from arching up into Merlin´s as well. The black haired boy could feel Arthur´s erection through his pants. He kissed his way down, getting dizzy by Arthur touch and smell, those two things that were so unmistakable and so familiar to him. He undid the buttons and pulled the trousers and boxers down, tossing them on the floor.

Now they both could feel the heat of the other boy´s body, which was turning them on even more. Merlin took Arthur´s cock into his mouth, sucking and swirling his tongue around slowly. The blonde´s breath was going heavy and he couldn´t held back the moans escaping from his mouth.

"Oh fuck, Merlin…" he groaned loudly, grabbing Merlin´s shoulder and digging his nails into it.

Merlin worked his way up again, kissing Arthur´s lips with so much passion that they needed to break apart for air just a few seconds later. They were staring at each other, panting heavily.

"I want you inside me, right now." Merlin whispered his voice husky and full of lust.

Arthur flipped them over again, reaching for his bedside table, and pulled the bottle of lube out.

He was sitting on Merlin´s lap now, their erections rubbing against each other with every move he made, driving a feeling of pleasure through their entire bodies.

They were still panting and Arthur placed a quick kiss on Merlin mouth before covering his cock and fingers with lube.

He knew it wasn´t easy, but somehow he wasn´t worried about hurting Merlin because he knew that this was where he belonged and this was what they both wanted.

He inserted two fingers and began stretching the other boy who moaned and shivered under Arthur´s touch. Soon a third finger was added and Merlin felt Arthur positioning his cock at his entrance.

He glanced up at the blonde and smiled, such an intense and heartwarming smile that Arthur didn´t need to ask for permission anymore. He wanted Merlin, he wanted to feel him more than anything.

"I love you." He whispered before pushing in.

Merlin gasped and arched his back when Arthur slid in, he needed a few seconds to adjust to the size of his cock, but it wasn´t hurting at all. The blonde filled him entirely and both boys had never felt more complete than right now.

Arthur began thrusting into Merlin, somehow managing to hit his prostate every time.

The black haired boy couldn´t hold back the moans and gasps.

"Arthur…oh god…"

He pulled the blonde down to him and started kissing every part of his body he could reach, Arthur responded equally. Lips and hands were everywhere, touching, tasting and exploring while the blonde kept thrusting into Merlin.

Their bodies found a rhythm very quickly and soon both boys weren´t able to think clearly anymore, they were moaning,gasping and holding on to each other.

When Arthur looked down at Merlin he couldn´t help but to think that he looked gorgeous. His eyes were closed, mouth half open, moans escaping from time to time. His hair was sticking to his forehead which was covered in sweat and his body was arching under his thrusts.

"Simply gorgeous…" Arthur murmured and suddenly Merlin´s eyes flew open, revealing the deep blue colored pupils in which the blonde could get lost forever.

The blonde was close, he could feel it and from the way Merlin´s eyes started to blur he could see that he wouldn´t last much longer as well.

Arthur bent down one last time, as close as possible to the other boy's ear.

"Merlin…" he whispered and the sound of his deep and soft voice was enough to send the other boy over the edge. He closed his eyes while digging his nails into Arthur´s shoulders and let out a loud moan while waves of pleasure were riding through his body

Arthur came shortly after collapsing onto Merlin and breathing heavily.

They lay there entangled for a few minutes, the after matches of their orgasm still lingering in the air and between them.

When Arthur was finally able to move again, he slid out of Merlin, which caused the black haired boy to gasp one last time.

They were both still a bit dizzy but somehow Merlin managed to pull the blankets over them and snuggled into Arthur´s arms. This was just perfect.

_More than perfect._ He thought.

He looked up and met Arthur´s gaze. The blonde smiled at him, this gorgeous sleepy smile, and pulled the strands of hair out of Merlin´s forehead, his fingers tracing down his cheeks.

"I love you, Merlin Emrys." He murmured, placing a soft kiss on the black haired boy´s forehead.

"I love you two, Arthur Pendragon." He answered smiling before both boys drifted off into sleep.


End file.
